It was three weeks already since the world had been thrown into a shit show. It was just ironic that I wasn't the only "Audrey" in this movie. This world looked like if Eli Roth and Stephen King had a baby. This was horror, in all its fullness.

"I'm blonde Kylie, double Oscars award-winning actress, One Emmy nomination, and 3 Golden Globes. And guess what? I'm just 21. You see why you need me in your movie?" Kylie laughed slightly as a tear dropped from her cheek. She made that statement 4 weeks ago while auditioning for a major role in the "Giggins" Blockbuster. 

Kylie was not kidding, or lying. She was all of these and more. However, her drug addiction had wrecked her career in the last year. She had lost all her major endorsement deals and more than many acting Gigs. She lost herself to heroin and cocaine following her dad's death. 

Apparently, money can't solve all your problems, and this was true in Kylie's dad's case. He was diagnosed with a rare form of blood disease and despite the millions she was willing to splurge to see her father regain his health, it was all futile. He was her only parent since her mum's death when she was much younger. He died and it broke her.

Drugs became her prayers to reach some sort of paradise where her life was not as unpleasant as the grief that defined her. She was a junkie, all messed up. After pushing everyone away; her friends, agents, colleagues and fans, she was alone and betrothed to drugs, just drugs.

"Does it ever get better?" She said as she sighed slowly to herself.

"Fuck, no! It doesn't" She replied herself in what looked like a castle of drugs, ugly stenches and liquor stains all around.  She lived in the Apperntonix Heights; the pinnacle of success for every career legend ever. 

"You know how they say drugs fuck with your memory?"  Kylie asked aloud.

She had become accustomed to this lifestyle of banter with herself, her drug packets, and a teddy bear on her bed which held great sentimental value to her because it was the last gift her dad gave her for her 20th birthday.

Kylie was no better than an Hikikomori; she had been in her Rapunzel tower for 9 months, long enough to have a baby, but she barely understood how time flew. What year, month or day was this for her? Just another sad day where she was to have a great embrace in Drug's arms. 

The past was all she was tethered to, and if she was being honest, it was slipping from her. She barely remembered what her mum looked like and all she had to trigger her pseudo-memories were vodka, and a ton of it.

The Blackout

It was more like another vivid hallucination for me, just that it wasn't all that to the world. I was high as a kite on that day, and the lights all flickered. I saw the sun through the window of my 104th storey apartment, and the next minute, it wasn't there.

I remember laughing maniacally at this new crazy trick my brain was creating to make me feel better, and then I passed out yet again. Come on! Before you judge me for being all much of a freak, I was high. Everything is funny when you're high, right?

The next morning or so I think with my fuzzy brain, I was awake with two things and zero thoughts- worse breath and darkness.

"This could not be real" I thought to myself as I could not see my unreal Hollywood ugly face. "I felt like my eyes had lost light in their sockets. There was this smell, not of something familiar, it smelt like a feeling, like a name, like a place" Kylie continued.

This was the most words Kylie had uttered sober in teenage-aged weeks. And this wasn't because all of a sudden she had made a resolution to be sober or abstain from drugs, it was because she just couldn't find her way to any bottle or pill case besides the ones she had recently finished that lay by her side.

After the Blackout

"I don't need your pity. I'm not the sad grieving addict you think I am. I am more than that, or at least, I used to be. Take a look at your ugly face, jerk. Is it any better than mine? I'm guessing not" Kylie said while sniffling and touching what felt like her teddy bear.

"Ko, Ko, ko, ko" Her door sounded. Someone was there and they were doing a pretty bad job at knocking. Kylie's heart raced faster as she was indecisive in her thinking about what to do or not do.

She had been on the floor for hours, so slowly, she dragged herself to the side of her door where the knock persisted and much louder.

"Kylie? Kylie…" The voice sounded familiar to Kylie and she shivered with a cold finding its way all the way down her spine. She froze, and so did her half-way opened lips.