I CLOSED MY eyes and listened carefully, I could hear the faint snapping of twigs. I knew Jake was nearby. I opened my eyes and crawled forward silently into a thick shrub of bushes. I heard another rustle before my 9 year old cousin leapt out from behind me. He laughed as he thought he had caught me by surprise but my reflexes were sharp and I twisted and we collided head-on.

He was a wolf so his jump was strong and high. We rolled down the path, tumbling and swallowing dirt on the way. We crashed into a tree and struggled to get up. 

I must have broken some bones but I got up just fine and helped Jake to his feet. I was older than him by almost 5 months. We were cousins, he was the son of the pack’s alpha and he was a werewolf, whereas the lycan gene has skipped me and jumped to my younger brother, Harry who was just five. 

“Jason?” Jake called, holding unto me hand.

“Hmmm?”

“You’re my best friend in the whole world and when I become alpha, you’d be my right hand man.”

I laughed at that. We were closer than cousins. He was just like my twin brother.

“When do you think you’ll become alpha?” 

“I dunno... I’ll ask my father to a duel. And then I’ll use all my skills. I’ve been practicing, you know...” 

I laughed again and tugged on his hand. “ Come on, it’s getting dark already. Let’s go home.”

He followed me but still said, “I’m not scared of the dark. I can see perfectly.” 

I could not prevent the searing pain that flashed through my chest. God, I wish I wasn’t a human. 

Are you?

That tiny voice nibbled in my mind. It had been there for as long as I can remember, constantly talking to me, replying questions I asked in my head. I talked to mum about it and if I didn’t know better, I’d say I saw a look of fear flashed in her eyes before she said it was just my subconscious mind talking to me whenever I feel lonely. 

If I was alone, I would have shouted back my reply but I didn’t want to scare Jake, so I just kept mute. 

We got to the entrance of the pack’s settlement and broke into a slight run. Jake was faster though, maybe because of the wolf in him. We got to our houses, out of breath and panting. We lived side by side, being as Mum is the Alpha’s younger sister and Dad is the Alpha’s right hand man and second in command. 

I got home just in time for dinner. As I settled in my seat, Mum gave me a stern glance and head to toe and said, “You’ll wash up before your meal.”

I had it in mind to grumble but seeing the look on Mum's face, I though better of it. I dragged me feet all the way to the bathroom to let her know I wasn’t in support of her command. 

Why must she be so harsh?

Because she’s your mother, a voice said in my head.

Yeah right.

I washed up quickly, put on a fresh change of clothes and rushed back to the dining room. I saw they had all waited for me to finish up before they started eating, I smiled inwardly and jumped on a seat beside Mum. 

I took a juicy steak and stuffed my mouth full and I turned to my Mum and said, “Mum, I heard that voice again.”

“Where?” She asked sharply.

“What voice?” Dad asked simultaneously. 

I looked from Mum, then Dad and back to Mum again, confused. Harry, my younger brother, decided to help me out.

“Jason’s been hearing scary voices in his head.” Harry yelled. He thought it was pretty funny because he started laughing. 

“it’s not scary... and its not voices... just a voice.” I protested loudly over his laughter. 

“How long have you noticed it?” Dad asked.

“I don’t know... Two years, maybe.” I said nonchalantly. I poked my steak with a knife. 

“Two years and you never thought to tell me.” Dad said quietly, as if pondering. 

Mum reached out and grasped his hand. “He didn’t tell me. i just knew about it about it when I caught him talking to himself and questioned him. That was about six months ago.” 

Dad still looked like he didn’t believe her until she added, “Besides, you have enough on your shoulders right now. I didn’t want to add to it.”

His eyes softened at that. It looked like he was going to cry. 

“I hear voices too.” Harry said, a little more quietly. 

“You’re a werewolf, Harry. Its your wolf talking to you.” Mum answered. 

“So do you think Jason is running mad?” Harry asked, banging his fists on the table. It would make a great story for him to entertain his friends for weeks.

“Stop that.” Mum snapped at him. 

“No Harry. Your brother is not running mad.” 

He stopped banging and looked slightly disappointed at the news of my sanity. Then he glanced at me and giggled. I had a feeling that he was still going to tell his friends that I was mad anyway. 

I caught Dad’s glances a couple of times during the remainder of my dinner. I winked at him whenever our eyes met and he would smile back. 

AFTER DINNER, WE went to bed quite early. I stared out my window. I couldn’t sleep. I snuck out to the porch with a blanket which I wrapped  around my body. I sat on the floor and looked up at the moon. It was half full but it was still bright. I heard someone come out behind me and by instinct I knew it was Dad. 

Breathe in.

I took a deep breath and his scent filled my lungs. 

“You’re still talking to yourself?” He asked softly, plopping himself down on the floor beside me. 

I nodded. 

“How loud is the voice?” 

I shrugged. “I dunno.” 

How loud are you?  

Not so loud. Maybe a little higher than a whisper. It replied.

I repeated those words to My Dad. He simply said “Hmmm" and nodded. 

“What does it all mean?” I asked, confused all again. 

“it’s your spirit animal talking to you.” He said it like he was talking about playing ball with me and Harry. “And from loudness, I figured it’s not much above  a kitten.”

“My spirit animal? But I’m human” I struggled to digest the information. 

Are you?

“You are not. Jason... Look at me.” Dad told me, softly. 

I turned to face him. The moonlight gave his face a pale blue colour, not his eyes though, they twinkled with intensity. 

“What I’m about to tell you, you must listen carefully. Any little mistake – BAM! You’re killed or crazy people would be coming after your head. You hear me?”

Those words were heavy for a 9 year old like me but I nodded solemnly and listened.