At that time... I remember that... I was not yet aware of the fear that the sight of a beast provoked in my body... ....

I was so small and deluded...

...

I find myself on the outskirts of the house where I live, beating with a stick a somewhat battered doll of a beast. Which my mother created for me.

It is a somewhat simple doll, it is even a little funny.

I am only 10 years old, my name is Roxanne, I am very small in stature and I have long white hair, I am the daughter of Elizabeth, a very powerful apostle who is in charge of protecting the city from the beasts that are out there.

To be honest... I have never seen any, since I have lived all this time in these islands. Which protect us from those creepy beasts out there.

My mother says they are very ugly and scary. She herself even mentions that she is very scared when she sees one and that she usually trembles too much when she has to face those things.

The truth is, I can't imagine my mother shaking in front of one of those creatures.

"I bet my mother must take those beasts down too easy."

"She sure beats them to a pulp!"

I start hitting the doll harder until I make an opening in it.

"No!"

"It can't be, it's the only one I have, I can't break it."

I try to put it together with the fabric of the doll itself, but it's useless....

"My mother will be mad at me if I break it..."

"I know!"

I'll try to use my thread magic to fix it....

In this world, everyone possesses some kind of magic, it's something we are born with, some develop it earlier than others, but in general everyone has magic.

Normally magic is governed by the natural elements, such as fire, air, plant, earth. But there are more types, like the type of magic that my mother and I use, which is thread magic.

The truth is a little complicated to explain why there are these special types of magic. What's more, I don't fully understand it either, and I don't think my mother does either.

"Okay, here I go..."

I extend my hand, leaving my palm in the air as I point at the doll.

"Come on, please. It works..."

I begin to perform force to get the string out of my hand.

My hand even trembles from the excess bodily and mental force I am performing so that the thread can flow from my body.

The truth is that I am still a beginner in this using my magic. Therefore, it is quite complicated for me to perform this, but I must try so that my mother does not discover me.

...

After a while of struggling, finally some very thin green threads started to come out from my fingertips, but they were not very stable.

It takes a lot of mental concentration to hold these threads.

I begin to feel very tired and my head hurts.

"Now I must move my hand closer to the doll so that it starts to bake the fabric."

I move my hand slowly towards the doll so that the threads start moving in the direction of the doll, but for some reason it is impossible to move them, they are totally paralyzed.

"Come on... Move..."

I try to use more concentration on my threads to manage to move them, but it's still impossible.

...

After a while of everything tried being useless, a hand touches my shoulder.

"Hello... naughty girl."

Startled, I start to turn my head only to see my mother with a smile looking straight at me.

My mother is a slim 175 cm woman, she has long, curly, blonde hair. She also has beautiful blue eyes.

"I, I wasn't doing anything mother."

I tell her that to then cover the doll with my body and then smile in a nervous way.

"You were playing with that doll, weren't you?"

My mother asks me that, as she watches me with a prying look.

"Of course not."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

I turn my face to look at the ground, as I say that.

"Roxanne...you know I'm not stupid."

My mother holds out her hand to then expel golden colored threads from her fingers.

With the threads she charges me to remove me from the doll she was covering.

"I... I don't know how that got there."

I said that to then cross my arms and look away.

"Listen... Roxanne, I know you like to play with this doll and that's why I created it for you myself, but you can't neglect your other activities of daily life because of this taste you have"

My mother says that, then looks at me worriedly.

"I don't neglect my daily life activities..."

I replied that to my mother.

"No?"

"Then why didn't you go to school today?"

My mother asked me that while looking at me a little angrily.

"Of course I did go, it's just that they let us out earlier."

I told her a lie to see if she would believe it.

"That's clearly a lie, I know you've been out of school for 2 weeks."

My mother answers me that as she looks me straight in the eyes angrier than before.

"It's okay...yes I have missed school".

I answered her with sincerity and at the same time a little depressed.

"Why are you sad, daughter?"

"Listen I know school is boring, but you have to do it to have proper learning for your future."

My mother says that, as she reaches over to stroke my head.

"It's just that my classmates make fun of me, mother."

I replied with a little tear in my eyes. For, it is true, I am falling too far behind in controlling my magic. And that is precisely why my peers see me as an object of ridicule.

"Honey, kids will always do that, you just have to know how to take it as a joke that's all."

"Come on, let's keep talking inside, I must see how your sister is doing."

Our house is located on the center island. Which surround the 12 islands, in the center island live the people of high social status, besides being the most powerful in the control of magic.

The design of our house is very nice because it is like several igloos joined together, it has 2 floors, subway and is made of Adobe. In addition, it is painted white. The windows are made of wood and glass, mostly square and some round. The house has enough windows to look outside, my mother says it is for a theme of having more vision on what is happening outside, on the other hand, our house also has many plants and flowers that are found by the roof, walls and some windows of this and finally. The length and width of the house is quite large. Counting about 70 or 75 square meters approximately, which is distributed in 3 bedrooms, a living room, dining room, kitchen and bathroom.

Oh no, now that I remember, my mother told me to prepare her food and I completely forgot.

As I opened the door my sister's cries began to be heard crying.

My mother's face again turned angry again as she heard those screams.

"Roxanne, how is it possible that you completely forgot about your sister!"

My mother screams that to then run in the direction of where my sister's crib is to take her in her arms.

My sister Sophie is just a 1 year old baby.

"I bet you must be very hungry."

My mother says that as she carries her in her arms and does some monkey business with her face to cheer her up.

It's not my fault that she leaves me in charge babies, I have other things to do.....

"Don't ever neglect your sister like that again, Roxanne."

My mother says that, while still making Sophie laugh.

"But nothing happened to her."

I say that, as I look away unconcerned.

"That's not the point."

"She's your sister and you should take care of her"

"You know I'm not at home all the time and that's why I need you to help me with your sister's care."

My mother answers me that after she stops monkeying around with her face and focuses directly on her talk with me.

"I know, mother, forgive me."

I apologize because deep down she's right, she's out of the house most of the day and usually arrives a little before dinner time. Which doesn't allow her to take much care of Sophie and me.

During the only period of the day where I can talk to my mother, it's usually during the dusk and evening.

"Don't worry daughter, I understand it's hard for you, but I expect you to do your best please. After all, the 3 of us have to make it through."

"Now, help me with the food, will you?"

...

After a while of helping my mother prepare the food, we finally sit down at the table.

What we prepare together is quite simple, Fish with fried rice and salads, but to tell you the truth, it's one of my favorite meals.

"I'm kind of exhausted, daughter. So, I'll eat and go to sleep because tomorrow I have an important event I have to attend."

My mother is right, you look quite tired, I also think you have not been sleeping well these last few days, you have a little dark circles under your eyes.

"It's okay, mother, don't worry, after eating I will take care of the dishes."

I reply that to my mother, while smiling at her.

My mother just nods her head to thank me.

In the meantime, my mother gives food to my sister Sophie. Who is very happy to be eating. Likewise, it's not like she's gone the whole day without eating, she's only gone at most about 3 or 4 hours.

"Mother..."

I look my mother in the eyes, as I start playing with what little food I have left on my plate.

"What's wrong?"

My mother replies, as she continues to feed Sophie.

"I wish I could be like you."

I tell her that with much joy. Even my eyes sparkle with happiness too.

"Oh, because you want to be like me?"

My mother, with a totally dull and thoughtful face. She asks me that.

"Because you're like a superhero to me!

My mother is surprised and drops some food from the spoon. Which falls straight to the floor.

"You really think that?"

My mother says that in a muffled and sad way.

"Listen..."

"I don't think you should look at it that way. Since, for me it's totally different."

"For me it's totally useless the work I do."

My mother, avoiding eye contact with me, says that.

"Why do you say that, Mother!!!?

I got a little upset. So, I got up from the table and pounded with my fists.

I react this way because I don't like it when my mother belittles herself or gives short shrift to the work she does because it is so important.

"Roxanne, you don't have to get angry."

"After all, I'm just telling the truth."

My mother again agrees with me and totally ignores my rejection of her opinion. So, she continues to eat leaving the subject aside.

"How can you say that, mother!"

"Besides you react in a totally annoying way!"

I yell at my mother again, angrily.

"Roxanne, understand. You're just a child still, that's why you don't understand much of the things that happen in this world."

My mother answers me again, again avoiding eye contact with me.

"Just because I don't know about the world is no reason to give short shrift to the work you do!"

I am absolutely right in what I am saying, after all. It's thanks to my mother that we are still giving it up to the beasts out there, on the other hand, it's also thanks to her that we are able to survive.

My mother is very important in this world, thanks to her thread magic, it has been possible to create weapons for the soldiers who do not have much control of their magic, it was also possible to create ships to get out of this corner surrounded by sea. In addition, thanks to her many of the soldiers who have left come back alive, because she is an expert fighter who always succeeds in her missions, defeating every beast that crosses her and protecting her comrades.

My mother is very important for everyone's progress.

"Roxanne, I know your respect for me is a lot and I appreciate it, but really, I'm not as important as you think."

My mother finishes by saying that and getting up from the table, carrying Sophie in her arms.

"Wait, mother!"

I yell that to my mother.

She stops a few seconds after my shout.

"I... I know I don't understand much about this world and I know you are still suffering from my father's death."

It's true... my Father died a few months ago, he. Just like my mother. He was an important man, being one of the highest ranking generals protecting the queen.

Unfortunately he died in combat against the beasts, there are not many details about his death, only that is known.

"Your father's death has affected us both, Roxanne."

My mother, she just says that. Without turning to look at me.

As my father was the general in charge of protecting the queen, my mother is an apostle in charge of protecting the islands.

If we analyze it a little, it is impossible to believe that my father died. Their missions are totally different. In fact, my mother's missions are considerably more dangerous than my father's, but still, my father died. My father died. That alone makes it clear that danger is everywhere.

Roles are very much established in this city.

The soldiers tend to be in charge of the safety of the inhabitants and the interior of each of the islands, they submit very little to the potential danger of the beasts.

The Warriors have the mission of following the apostles to the exploration missions that they carry out on the outskirts of these islands, one could say that they are like their private armies.

The Cherubim are magicians who are in the ascension to be apostles, you could say that they are like the right hand of the apostles. Their mission can be as simple as permanent training or as difficult as exploration alongside the apostles or some unforeseen war against the beasts.

The Virtues or Apostles are the wizards who represent each of the islands, usually there are 12, and they are at the head of the research and explorations that take place outside. In addition, they have direct contact with the beasts, having to defeat all those that are out there.

The Powers are the queen's generals and are in charge of supervising the virtues or apostles, as well as taking care and protecting the queen herself and the castle.

And finally, Seraphim, which is how the person who rules over this city is known.

My mother has the rank of a virtue or apostle and my father had the rank of a power.

All this is what I have learned from my mother and school, and in my opinion it is more than enough.

I don't need to be a genius to be aware that my mother is an important woman and so was my father.

"I know that the loss of my father has been very hard for the family and that it is complicated for you to be alone at the head of the family, it is not easy at all to have to fulfill missions in which you risk your life and also to have to take care of 2 daughters".

I feel like tears are coming out of my eyes when I say that.

"But, that's why I want to be like you."

"I want to be a fighter, I want to be able to go outside and face those creatures to continue giving hope to humanity and also, you, mother. You can rest."

...

Saying that, my mother turned to look at me with some tears in her eyes.

At the same time, my sister Sophie. Confused, she looked directly at my mother.

"What are you trying to say with that, Roxanne?"

My mother, with her deep gaze between tears, was looking directly at me.

I swallowed some saliva, closed my eyes and clenched my fists, preparing myself for what she was about to say.

"I want to be a virtue mother, just like you."

"I want to train enough so that I can defeat beasts and you can rest at home taking care of Sophie."

"I don't want you to keep risking your life, I think you should rest and live peacefully now."

After saying that, my mother's eyes widened to the point of looking like she would have a heart attack.

Moreover, my mother was also dumbfounded by what I said.

"No, you won't!"

As if it were a muscular reaction, my mother was quick to respond.

"What? But why not?"

I replied to my mother, confused. Since, repeatedly in the past I had told her about my dream of wanting to be like her.

"I won't allow it, it's too deadly a job for you!"

My mother, likewise, shouted back.

"I don't understand, why are you reacting this way? You should support me for this dream."

I reply to my mother, while placing my hand on my chest.

"It's impossible, I will never allow it!

My mother screams too loudly, which causes Sophie to start crying.

"Oh, come on, calm down, mom is a fool, she shouldn't have screamed like that!"

My mother starts stroking Sophie's head, while saying things to her to try to calm her down.

"Listen, Roxanne, I don't think we should be having this talk right now, but I will be clear and precise. I cannot as your mother allow you to enter this world."

My mother calmed down and replied.

"Do you think I am weak, Mother?"

I ask her that, as I again make direct eye contact with her.

"It's not that, Roxanne. It's just that I wouldn't want you to enter this scary world."

My mother answers that, but at the same time she sounds insecure.

"I know you think I'm weak, Mother. Actually, everyone thinks that."

I reply again to my mother.

"That's not the point, Roxanne. I know you still don't control your magic very well and you're a little behind compared to your peers, but that's not what this is about."

...

My mother took a pause to think and spoke again.

"It's about the fact that I don't want anything bad to happen to you or Sophie. That's all."

"Besides, you've never seen a beast, they really are terrifying and they are very strong, I've seen many people die and I wouldn't want that to happen to you."

"I wouldn't stand for it..."

My mother this time answered with more sincerity and what she said was as if it touched my soul.

"But mother, I believe I can take on a beast without something happening to me. I assure you. I may be small now and not know much, but I will learn many more things in the future, I promise you!"

I said that and then put force on with my right arm.

My mother laughed a little at that.

"I know you're still a child, but the world isn't all roses, Roxanne. I'll tell you that much."

"I wish I had that enthusiasm you have again."

"I don't know at what point I lost it."

My mother sounded rather sad with that last thing she said.

"I guess I don't know anything about the world, as you say..."

"But I want to strive for what I want!"

My mother just watches me. Like she knows she should end this dream of mine, but at the same time she doesn't want to.

"Roxanne, your dream... it's quite dangerous."

"Leaving this place and having to face beasts in order to make way for the future, it's a very scary thing, I always tremble when I have to face a beast."

"I know that you possibly you will feel that too if you get to see one, but. To be honest, I wouldn't want you to see one in your life, for your well being, it's better that you don't."

It feels weird that my mother is talking in such a mature way to me.

It almost makes me want to give up this dream, but I can't.....

I want my mother to be able to rest and live a peaceful life as soon as possible.

"Mother, but are you forgetting the doll that you yourself created for me?"

I replied, as I pointed to the doll which was in the corner of the wall, on a chair.

"Yes, Roxanne. I know I created that doll for you, with the purpose that you could fulfill your dream of fighting a beast... but it's very different in real life."

"I just want to keep you and Sophie safe."

My mother said that.

"But, Mother. I want to protect you and Sophie too."

My mother, hearing that cheered up a little.

"Your father would be very happy to hear you say that you want to protect us, but Roxanne. You had better not make a virtue out of yourself and I ask you to please listen to me."

"Good night..."

...

My mother said that last thing and went to sleep....

Tonight I won't be able to sleep...