Couples Counseling

Felix the hedgehog let out a resounding grunt, and a portal opened behind him. A bunch of people walked out of it. They were grown-ups, seven couples, to be exact. Meanwhile, the other liaisons used magic to bring seven tables and chairs to the garden. 

Each of the seven couples was asked to occupy a table. They seemed to be under some spell, so they followed the general commands of the liaisons.

The adults all wore swimsuits as well. 'What's with the swimsuits?' Pan wondered. 'Is everyone expecting to go to the beach? Why am I the only one left out?' He was about to ask Jewel when the hedgehog spoke up.

"As Managing Liaison, I will take this opportunity to explain the rules of the first test," Felix began. "The purpose of the God of Love is not only to create new matches but also to mend broken matches. It will be easy for the successor of Eros to do so once they have received the divine powers. But can they fix painful love through human abilities? Let's find out."  

"Each couple in this gathering is dysfunctional," he continued. "They are about to be divorced or broken up bitterly. Thus we are convinced that they despise each other. Moreover, they haven't had sex with each other for periods ranging from a few months to a few years. Pretty miserable." 

Felix turned to the teenagers. "Let me tell you how the test will happen. Each Eros candidate will be allotted a couple. You must counsel and convince them to fall in love again and be attracted to each other again. How you achieve the feat is completely up to you. Your animal liaisons will join me in the review council, where we will rate each candidate's performance."

Jewel the frog, Sebastian the ferret, Fluffy the rattlesnake, Brine the bull terrier, Coco the parrot, and Cosmo, the possum, joined Felix in front of a small waterfall.

"Do not worry about the human adults," Felix explained further. "They are under the influence of magic. After we finish the test, they will be returned to Earth with no memories of today except what you have contributed to their relationship. I will take responsibility for censoring any untoward activities that may happen as a direct result of your counseling. Now, please join the tables where your nameplate has been affixed." 

Pan and the others looked for their names and found the allotted places. A water bubble appeared over each table as soon as the candidates joined the couples.

"Do not be alarmed," Felix continued. "Above each table is a test bubble. The bubble will burst when you have made the couples fall for each other. That will signal that you may leave the table. However, this does not automatically make you pass the test. The liaison council will still rate your performance. Is that clear?" 

The boys and girls exchanged glances and nodded.

"You have fifteen minutes," Felix declared. "Your time starts… now!"

Pan eyed the couple seated at his table. They were in their early thirties. The man and woman were decent looking—great hair, healthy bodies, and waxed skin. However, they refused to look at each other's faces.

"Umm…" Pan mumbled.

"What?!" both turned and asked him at the same time.

"Why don't you two like each other anymore?"

"Where should I begin?" the man explained irritably. "She's selfish, arrogant, and does not listen to a word I say."

"Ditto," the woman responded, looking at Pan. "Plus, he is pompous, sexist, and ogles at any woman who passes by."

"As if you don't look thirsty when you see young, ripped guys," the man fired at her directly.

"Fuck you!"

"Not in a million years!"

"Umm…" Pan tried to butt in. "Umm…" 

But the quarreling couple ignored him and continued abusing each other.

Splat! Two tables away, the bubble burst. It was Ivy's. The sexy, slutty girl. Apparently, she had suggested to the couple that all three could have an orgy together. The couple, otherwise depressed with their relationship, were excited to have a third person. They had hopped on the table and fooled around with each other, thus reigniting their lost passion. 

Once they started ripping their clothes off, Felix interfered by sending a magical cloud of white haze to Ivy's table. Everything they did was censored- both sights and sounds. Ivy kept encouraging them to be more hardcore. A portal opened under the couple in no time, and they fell through.

"Good job!" Fluffy, her liaison, exclaimed.

"If you have succeeded in the task, you can sit on the rock bench beside the waterfall," Felix declared. Ivy catwalked towards the bench. Her translucent swimsuit was wet from the bubble burst. If Pan were not occupied with his allotted couple, he would have caught very explicit images in his memory.

The boy's anxiety was at its peak. If he failed in the first stage, he would be returned to Earth, abandoned, and forgotten. He did not want that to happen.

Splat! Another bubble blew up. It was the one above Penelope's table. 

The bombshell had somehow convinced her couple that their feelings for each other still existed. She had made good arguments about their history and present. Besides, she was so beautiful that it was difficult to disagree with her.

Splat! Jackie's bubble burst. Her singing diva charm had done its wonders.

Pan turned to his couple with a grimace. "Please listen to me, guys. You need to like each other again."

"Like him?" the woman spat. "I'd rather eat my shoe!"

"Like her?" the man fired back. "I'd rather fuck a goat!"

Splat! Another bubble went off. It was Blaze's couple. Pan wondered if he threatened them into liking each other. But it also set off an inferiority complex within him. What if he was the black sheep, and Jewel made a mistake?

The garden was filled with Felix's magical white haze. That meant most couples had already ignited their passions. There was no restriction on sexual activity as long as it was censored. A portal opened under the couple as soon as they had a mental or physical orgasm, and they were sent back to Earth. Felix made sure their preceding physical activity was not seen by anybody else.

'If I am to lose, I don't know what I am going to do!' Pan thought with disappointment.

Cory, Pan, and Zete were left with live bubbles. No matter how much the three tried, they couldn't change the minds of their couple.

"Last minute!" Felix announced.

Cory and Zete gave up and joined their animal liaisons.

"It's okay if you can't complete the task," Zete murmured to Pan before leaving. "This is not an elimination round."

Pan gave some thought to Zete's suggestion. "Yeah, I guess I should give up," he told himself. 'Give up and be one of the sheep, as usual. A random person in the crowd. One of those at the bottom of the list.'

No!

No!

"NO!!" the boy screamed.

Pan closed his eyes and grabbed the wrists of the man and the woman. "I command you two to have sex right now!" His voice was gravelly and demoniacal all of a sudden. "Right now!"

"What the heck is the kid doing?" Felix asked his colleagues.

"There is something weird about the boy," Fluffy chimed in. "I sense trouble."

The couple looked at Pan and then at each other. The bubble above them swirled and instantly turned into a haze of red vapor instead of bursting. 

Jewel gasped as the world went into slow motion.

The man's features changed. His eyes bulged, and fangs grew out of his mouth. He grew taller, muscular, and almost beast-like. The man tore off his clothes. 

"My love, my one true love! My cum bucket!" he screamed at his wife in a disgusting tone. His fifteen-inch erection plopped on the table. 

"Oh, my battering ram!" the woman squealed. "Get inside my beaver now!" Her body had changed as well. Her hair turned crimson, and she turned unnaturally curvy. Tearing her clothes off, she lay on the table and spread her legs wide. A spurt of steaming fluid dripped from her between her thighs.

"Nooooo!" Felix exclaimed, sending a cloud of fog toward them. 

Pan, who had his eyes closed, turned to the hedgehog and opened his eyes. His right eye was a dark vortex. A trickle of blood flowed from it. From inside, echoes of a monster were heard as if they rose from a bottomless pit.

Whup! The fog cloud dissipated. 

Having failed in censoring the couple, Felix sent haze before the eyes of all candidates. There was no way he would let another human be witness to such an anomaly.

The mutated man ripped into the woman's hairy canyon with his enormity. They groaned and squealed together like feral beasts, spewing their fluids in the garden. The secretions burned the grass and melted stones as they dripped onto them. 

The wind picked up around Pan, and the sunlight seemed to dim. The lawn grass and flowers withered and rotted.

"What's going on?" Sebastian demanded. Only the liaisons could see the bizarre series of events.

"He has the flame of Artemis," Felix said with a tremor in his voice. He opened a portal under the mutated fornicating couple. "Begone monsters!" The magic did not open a door into Earth but into the mouth of a volcano.

Whoop! They fell through the hole into the inferno, and the portal closed. The microclimate returned to normal abruptly.

Pan collapsed from his chair and passed out.