Novels by yudiagit

"My spine! I think my lumbar support just permanently collapsed!" Henry groaned, spitting out red carpet fiber as the floor beneath him vibrated violently."Is that a bone? Did I just hear a bone snap?!" Mr. Sterling shrieked, his voice muffled by the wet apron draped over his face. "Henry! Tell me we're not going to be buried under three tons of high-end slot machines! My investment portfolio cannot handle this kind of physical depreciation!""No, that was just the load-bearing pillar behind us, Sterling. Totally normal corporate restructuring!" Henry coughed, waving his hands through the rising yellow dust. "Can you stand? Because our window for a graceful exit is rapidly closing!""I can't feel my legs! Or my Rolex! Do you know how much this watch costs?!" Sterling wailed, frantically shaking his wrist in the dim, red-tinted darkness. "This is a disaster! I was supposed to be at a Michelin-star dinner in forty-five minutes! I had a reservation for the wagyu, Henry! The wagyu!""For

"Cough! Cough! Oh, great, now my lungs are participating in a Vance Biotech focus group!" Henry yelled, waving his hands frantically through the thick yellow haze. "Jackson, you absolute parasite! This is a serious OSHA violation!""Henry! I can’t breathe! This suit is dry-clean only, and now it’s full of industrial poison!" Mr. Sterling wailed, his voice muffled as he buried his face in a plush leather cushion. "I’m going to sue this entire establishment! I’m going to sue your company! I’m going to sue your hair!""Just hold your breath, Sterling! And stop worrying about your wardrobe! We have bigger issues, like the fact that I can't see my own hands!" Henry called back, his eyes watering violently. He reached down and patted his breast pocket. "You alright in there, little buddy? Don't inhale the yellow stuff!""Mew," the kitten whimpered softly, tucked deep inside the fabric, its tiny nose pressed against Henry’s clean undershirt."Good boy, just stay low," Henry muttered, squinti

"This is it, Henry! We’re trapped! We are literally canned sardines in bespoke suits!" Mr. Sterling shrieked, his hands frantically clawing at the seamless steel plates of the security shutters. "Do something! You’re the one with the high-speed kung fu!""I am trying to calculate our options, Sterling, but you screaming in my ear is severely affecting my mental processing speed!" Henry yelled back, his back pressed against the cold metal barrier."Mew," the kitten whimpered from his pocket, shivering against his chest."I know, buddy. It's a highly stressful work environment," Henry whispered, gently patting the tiny orange head. He looked up, his eyes narrowing as three massive, heavily armed enforcers stepped forward. They wore full tactical body armor, Kevlar vests, and combat helmets that made them look like terrifying, faceless insects."Oh, look at that," Henry muttered, trying to keep his voice steady. "They brought the elite team. And here I am, armed only with a torn pair of

"Any last words, Henry?" Jackson sneered, his finger tightening on the trigger of the matte-black pistol. "Because your audit ends right here.""Actually, yes! I have several queries regarding your corporate expense reports!" Henry shouted, slowly lowering his knees to adjust his center of gravity. "For instance, did you really think no one would notice the three thousand dollars spent on 'business-related hair product'?""It's a legitimate marketing expense!" Jackson roared. "And you won't live to contest it!""We'll see about that, you over-gelled parasite!" Henry yelled.With a sudden, violent twist of his hips, Henry slammed both hands onto the edge of the velvet-lined mahogany table. Utilizing his newly acquired permanent dexterity, he flipped the heavy surface upward in a blur of movement."What the—!" Jackson gasped as a tidal wave of heavy ceramic poker chips, half-empty champagne flutes, and a silver ice bucket flew directly into his face."Eat plastic, Jackson!" Henry cheere

"I am not doing a cabaret dance, and I am definitely not going to suffer from permanent squeaky-toy hiccups," Henry muttered to himself, pressing his ear firmly against the frosted glass pane of VIP Lounge 3."Mew," the orange-and-white kitten squeaked softly from his breast pocket, its tiny whiskers tickling Henry’s chin."Shh, little buddy," Henry whispered, raising his smartphone. "We are in the middle of high-stakes corporate espionage. If Jackson hears us, he’s going to turn us both into permanent liabilities. Now, let's see if this microphone can pick up their conversation."Through the thick glass, Jackson’s smug, nasal voice drifted out, sounding entirely too confident."The database is fully compiled, Mr. Sterling," Jackson said. "Every single client profile, proprietary financial algorithm, and transaction history is on this encrypted drive. It’s a clean sweep.""And you are certain the forensic trail points entirely to your annoying accountant friend?" another voice asked—a

"Put the brakes on, pal! Right here!" Henry pointed aggressively at a dark, narrow alleyway just thirty feet short of the flashing, multi-colored entrance of the Neon Dragon Casino.The cabbie slammed on the brakes, looking back at Henry with raised eyebrows. "The alley? You sure, buddy? The red carpet is right there. Don't you want to make an entrance?""If I make an entrance through the front lobby, I'm going to be forced to dance cabaret in a pink feather boa," Henry said, his voice deadly serious."Uh, okay. Sure," the cabbie said, slowly nodding as he eyed Henry’s torn trousers and the tiny orange-and-white kitten poking its head out of his breast pocket. "That's... a very specific fear.""It's not a fear, it's a digital ultimatum!" Henry groaned, throwing a crumpled fifty-dollar bill onto the front seat. "Keep the change! I have to go cheat a cosmic system by entering through the kitchen!""Hey, thanks for the tip, crazy lady-killer!" the cabbie called out as Henry scrambled out