96 Why do shops insist on moving their stuff around? I get it is to make you see more of their stock but seriously. I dont need to. Why put the picks with rakes and gardening tools. I eventually made it out of the shop with my things but I was now running late.When I got to my car and set off I had twenty-five minutes to make a thirty-minute drive. Now I had to put my foot down and pray I didn’t see any cops.Every turn I made was painstakingly slow. A bus got in my way then a learner driver followed by a tractor. It was like the world wanted me to miss my appointment. I looked at the clock. Eleven thirty. I should be there now. At a rough guess I had about five minutes left to drive the rest the way. My drive was smooth and clear. Murderous thoughts filled my mind and body.I screeched to a holt outside the pub four minutes late. The beast I was going to meet walked out of the pub. I left the engine running and got out of my car. He

98Reaching across a car with a rag to cover someone’s mouth and nose is hard. It’s made even harder when you feel like shit. My guts were still churning but Lou had cottoned on to my plan. It was inevitable. I just wish I could have trusted her. She could have had a good life and maybe I would have stopped killing.Lou tried to put up a fight but I was too quick and strong for her. Somehow Adam stayed asleep through the brief shuffle. Small victories have to be taken when you can.Now the effects of chloroform don’t last long just a few minutes. So instead of just driving off hopping to get to her grave before she came too again I cable tied her hands and legs together. There was no need for a gag. When she comes round I will have questions for her to answer.We drove in silence on the road for about half a mile then turned right onto a dirt track. The track was muddy and only just wide enough for my car. Branches and bushes scrapped at

100It dawned on me that I hadn’t worked out how I was going to handle life with Adam on my own. The thought had never come to me that I would have to do e everything with him and for him.I hadn’t told the guys who were setting up our new lives Lou wasn’t going to be coming now. I wonder if I’m too late. It probably won’t matter that much. They will find out when they come for me tomorrow. Being alone means I don’t have a lot of loose ends to tie up. I should let work know I won’t be back in.Adam was still sleeping after our late night. Poor little fella. He won’t understand why mummy isn’t around anymore. He will be ok though he will adapt. His life with me will be good. I don’t think I will kill anyone for a while now. It is too much of a risk and I have too much at stake.There was a loud banging at my back door. Not a knock but an insistent banging. No one used my back door. So who could th