All Chapters of I Was the Joke: Now I'm the Punchline They Fear: Chapter 151
- Chapter 160
160 chapters
Chapter 151
Within two minutes, a bright, steady fire was burning in the old hearth. The yellow light danced across the ancient limestone walls and warmed the corner. "The chimney works perfectly," Marcus said, sitting down by the fire. "The mason who built this knew how to curve the back wall." Elena sat down beside him and set the small moka pot on two flat stones near the coals. Soon, the smell of dark roasting coffee mixed with the scent of burning chestnut wood. She poured the hot black coffee into their two ceramic mugs. There was no sugar and no milk, but the coffee was hot and rich. They held the warm mugs between their hands and drank in small sips. The fire warmed their faces while the night air cooled the open space above them. "What time did the markets close today?" Elena asked quietly. She was looking at the dancing flames on the stone hearth. "Four hours a
Chapter 152
Marcus loaded his trowel with a bead of lime paste. He pressed the steel blade against the gap and packed the mortar deep into the stone joint. He pushed it in firm until the joint was completely full and dense. Then he smoothed the surface with the flat edge of the blade, leaving it slightly recessed. "Good," Elena said, watching his technique. "Keep it behind the face of the stone so the water drains off." She began working on the joint right beside him. Her hands were steady and quick, packing the mortar with mechanical precision. For three hours, neither of them spoke a word. The only sound was the scrape of steel against stone and the clink of the trowels against the mortar boards. They worked along the south wall from the corner toward the door. Joint by joint, course by course, they locked the ancient limestone blocks back together. The fresh pale lime
Chapter 153
The fire died down to a bed of glowing red embers. Marcus woke in the middle of the night because the air had turned cold. The mountain chill had come down from the high limestone ridges, slipping through the open roof and settling over the terracotta floor.He reached out his hand. The cast-iron plate behind the hearth was still warm. It gave off a steady, gentle heat that kept the corner of the room comfortable. Beside him, Elena was sleeping on her side, wrapped tightly in two heavy wool blankets. Her breathing was deep and even. For the first time since they had fled Germany, she was not twitching in her sleep. Her hands were curled loose against her chest.Marcus pulled his blanket up over his shoulders. He listened to the night. There was no sound of distant traffic, no hum of air conditioning, and no whine of jet engines in the high sky. There was only the dry wind moving through the pine needles and the call of a barn owl down in the ravine. He stared up at the black sky throu
Chapter 154
Before they left the yard, Marcus bought two large coils of heavy galvanized steel wire, five boxes of four-inch forged iron roofing nails, a heavy iron block-and-tackle with fifty meters of thick hemp rope, and four rolls of black bitumen roofing underlayment. They loaded the nails, the wire, the underlayment, and the heavy iron pulley into the trunk of the Audi. The rear suspension of the car sank two inches under the weight of the steel and asphalt rolls. "Now we need food and supplies," Elena said. They drove back into the center of the town and parked near the open market square. Elena went into the butcher shop and the bakery, while Marcus went into the hardware store across the street. In the hardware store, Marcus bought two new steel pry bars, a heavy eight-pound sledgehammer, three flat wood chisels, an iron drawknife for peeling bark, and two bottles of linseed oil. He also bought three do
Chapter 155
From far down the mountain, muffled by the thick pine trees, came the deep, grinding whine of a heavy diesel truck in low gear. The sound grew louder, punctuated by the sharp hiss of pneumatic air brakes as the driver took the lower hairpin turn. Marcus climbed down the ladder. He walked to the edge of the terrace and stood beside Elena. A few minutes later, the massive green truck crested the final rise of the dirt track. It moved slowly, rocking from side to side like a ship in rough water. Its massive knobby tires churned through the loose limestone gravel. Behind it, the long flatbed trailer trailed along, carrying the stacks of clay tiles tied down with wide blue ratchet straps. On the bed of the truck lay the sixty chestnut rafters, their pale, freshly sawn ends glowing white in the sun, and the four massive Douglas fir purlins. The driver stopped the truck in the center of the wide clearing un
Chapter 156
Marcus went into the trees and returned with three long Scots pine poles they had cut and peeled three days ago. They were six inches thick at the base, straight and strong. He laid two of the poles on the ground, crossing them near the top to form a tall 'A' frame. He used the heavy galvanized steel wire to lash the tops together, wrapping the wire around the wood twenty times and twisting the ends tight with a pair of heavy pliers. At the apex where the poles crossed, he hung the heavy iron block-and-tackle. He threaded the thick hemp rope through the iron pulleys. "A simple shear-leg derrick," Marcus explained. "We raise the legs against the inside wall. We tie the back leg to an anchor stone on the terrace. Then we use the mechanical advantage of the double pulley. One person can pull fifty kilos and lift two hundred." "I can pull fifty kilos," Elena said. "I know you can," M
Chapter 157
Marcus woke before the sun. The room was dark, but the iron fireback still gave off a low, gentle heat. Through the open roof, the silver band of stars was fading into a cool gray mist.Beside him, Elena was sleeping on her side. Her breathing was deep and even. In the safe houses, she had slept like a dog in an alley, twitching at every noise in the street. Here, her hands were relaxed and open on the wool blanket.Marcus slid out from under the blanket without making a sound. The terracotta floor was cold against his bare feet. He pulled on his heavy canvas trousers, his wool socks, and his leather boots. He did not lace the boots to the top. He walked quietly across the room to the hearth.A few red embers still glowed under the gray ash. Marcus picked up the iron poker and pulled the red coals together into a small mound. He took a handful of dry pine shavings from the wood box and dropped them on top. He knelt down and blew softly into the ash.The shavings smoked for a second, t
Chapter 158
By the time the second purlin was pinned with a temporary wedge, the sun was high in the sky. The white fog had completely burned away from the valley, leaving the mountain slopes clear and green below them. Far down on the floor of the valley, the gray ribbon of the river sparkled in the noon light. Elena dropped the rope and sat down on a stone near the door. Her hands were red from the hemp rope, despite the calluses. "We eat now," she said. It was not a question. "Yes," Marcus agreed, climbing down from the scaffold. "We eat." They went into the kitchen. Elena cut thick wedges of cheese and the rest of the sourdough loaf. She reached into a clay jar on the shelf and pulled out a handful of cured black olives that were small, bitter, and slick with oil. They took the food outside and sat on the flat terrace wall, letting their legs hang over the drop. The
Chapter 159
Marcus dropped the hammer and the chisel onto the scaffold planks. He seized the pine log with both hands, threw his weight against it, and shoved it sideways. The timber slipped past the cut stone. It dropped into the bottom of the pocket with a solid, final CRACK that shook the entire wall. The derrick relaxed. The tension left the rope. Elena let the rope fall from her hands. She slumped back against the oak post, letting her head drop back. She was breathing hard, her shoulders trembling with fatigue. Marcus stood on the scaffold, looking down at the timber. It sat three inches deep in the granite bed, seated as firm as if it had grown there. He let out a long breath through his nose. He picked up his hammer and chisel and slid them back into his belt. "Good pull," he said down to her. She looked up at him through her messy hair. A sl
Chapter 160
Marcus smiled faintly, his eyes focused on the edge of the blade. "My grandfather had a small sawmill in the Black Forest," he said. "Before the war. He did not like circular saws. He said they tore the grain and made the timber weep sap. He built barns with hand tools, mortise and tenon, oak pegs and adzes." "How old were you?" "Twelve," Marcus said. "I spent three summers turning square billets into octagonal pegs just like this. He paid me five pfennigs for every hundred pegs that fit the gauge." "Did he beat you if they were too small?" "He did not beat me," Marcus said. "He just threw the small ones into the wood stove. If I spent all day making sixty pegs and thirty of them burned in the stove, I learned very quickly how to measure with my fingers." Elena touched the side of one of the finished pegs. It was smooth as bone, cool to the touch, smelling fa