The Hobgoblin charged.
It was three hundred kilograms of muscle, rage, and bad dental hygiene moving at the speed of a truck. The ground shook with every step.
"Master! Get back!"
Runa threw herself in front of me. She was brave. She was loyal.
She was also twenty kilograms lighter than the club swinging toward her head.
CRACK.
She blocked it with her sword, but the impact sent her flying. She slammed into the cavern wall, sliding down into a heap of groaning limbs.
"Runa!"
(She's dead. Oh god, she's dead, and I'm next. I need to run. Move, legs! Move!)
I tried to turn around. My brain screamed at my muscles to flee, to dive, to do anything.
But my body didn't listen.
The fear was so primal, so absolute, that it locked my joints in place. I stood there, frozen like a statue, my hands still in my pockets because I was too terrified to even take them out.
The Hobgoblin roared, raising its club for the finishing blow on me. Spittle flew from its mouth, landing inches from my shoes.
The stream chat was flying so fast it was a blur. user_slayer69: GG. It was a nice stream. simp_lord: DON'T JUST STAND THERE! RUN!
I looked at the monster. I looked at the club.
I looked at the System window hovering in my peripheral vision.
[Current Desire Points: 150.] [Shop Recommendation: 'Aura of the Sovereign' (One-Time Use).] [Cost: 150 DP.] [Effect: Projects the user's Killing Intent as a solid hallucination.]
(Buy it! Buy it now!)
[Item Purchased.] [Activating...]
The Hobgoblin took a step forward. The club began its descent.
I couldn't dodge. I couldn't block.
So I did the only thing a paralyzed, terrified man could do.
I lifted my right index finger.
And I brought it to my lips.
"Shhh."
(Please stop. Please don't squash me. I'm begging you.)
ZOOM.
The air in the cavern suddenly turned heavy. It wasn't mana. It was pressure.
To me, I was just a shaking guy saying "shush."
To the Hobgoblin, something very different happened.
The System took my 150 Desire Points and burned them all in a single millisecond to fabricate a reality where I was the scariest thing in the multiverse.
The shadow behind me exploded outwards. It didn't look like a shadow anymore. It twisted and writhed, forming the silhouette of a thousand-meter tall Dragon God with eyes of burning crimson.
The Hobgoblin froze mid-swing.
Its eyes bulged. It looked at me—at the tiny, fragile human—and saw death incarnate.
It saw a being so powerful that its mere existence was an insult to the laws of physics.
"You are loud," I whispered, my voice trembling.
(I'm crying. I'm actually crying inside.)
The System amplified the tremble. It didn't sound like fear. It sounded like the low rumble of a volcano about to erupt.
The Hobgoblin dropped its club.
It clutched its chest. Its green skin turned a sickly shade of grey.
Its heart, pumping adrenaline at maximum capacity to fuel its rage, suddenly slammed into a wall of absolute terror.
Thump-thump... CRACK.
The monster let out a wet gurgle.
It fell to its knees. Then, face first into the dirt.
Dead.
Silence.
Absolute silence.
Even the water dripping from the stalactites seemed to pause.
(Did... did it trip? Did I win?)
I stood there, finger still raised to my lips. My heart was beating so fast I thought I was the one having cardiac arrest.
Runa groaned, pulling herself out of the rubble. She looked up.
She saw the massive Boss monster lying dead at my feet. She saw me standing over it, unmoving, with one finger raised.
"Master..." she rasped, her eyes wide as saucers. "You... you didn't even touch it."
I slowly lowered my hand. I tried to exhale, but I had to make sure it didn't sound like a sigh of relief.
"I told you," I said, my voice hollow and distant. "It was too loud."
(My legs are jelly. If I try to walk, I will fall. I have to stand here until the blood returns to my feet.)
I looked at the camera.
The view count had frozen. Then it jumped.
1,000. 5,000. 10,000.
The chat wasn't moving fast anymore. It was a solid wall of text.
user_slayer69: ...WTF? simp_lord: Did you see the air pressure?! The monster had a heart attack just from his aura! HunterFan99: HE ONE-SHOT A BOSS WITH A SHUSH. IronBloodLeader: Hax. Report him for hacking.
[System Alert.] [Achievement Unlocked: 'Viral Sensation'.] [Reward: +5,000 DP.] [Passive Income: +10 DP/minute from Global Fame.]
Five thousand points.
I felt the energy rush into me. It was intoxicating. The pain in my chest vanished completely. My vision sharpened.
I felt... good.
I walked over to the corpse. I kicked it lightly with my shoe.
"Disappointing," I muttered. "I expected it to last at least two seconds."
(Thank you for dying. Thank you so much. I love you, Mr. Hobgoblin.)
Runa limped over to me. She looked at the corpse, then at me. Tears streamed down her dusty face.
"I am unworthy!" she wailed, dropping to her knees again. "I struggled against minions, while you extinguished a King with a whisper! I have so much to learn!"
I patted her head. It was becoming a habit.
"You survived," I said. "That is the first lesson. Survival is the only truth."
(Also, please carry the loot. I'm exhausted.)
"Renji Amagiri," I said to the camera, zooming in on my face. I gave a lazy wink. "Remember the name. Because I'm the only one who can save you from your own mediocrity."
I ended the stream.
The moment the red light went off, I slumped against the dead Hobgoblin.
"Master?" Runa asked, concerned.
"Meditation," I lied quickly, closing my eyes. "I used... 0.01% of my power. I need to recalibrate my seals so I don't accidentally blow up the moon on the way home."
"Understood!" Runa whispered reverently. "I will guard your trance!"
I sat there in the damp dungeon, smelling of goblin sweat and ozone, listening to the "ping" of System notifications filling my bank account.
I had done it.
I was viral.
But as I looked at the dark tunnel leading back to the surface, a chill ran down my spine.
Fame was a double-edged sword.
And somewhere in Tokyo, a Detective with a lie-detection skill was probably watching that replay in slow motion.
(Oh no. The police.)
Latest Chapter
Chapter 39: Split Up
Darkness.Absolute, suffocating darkness.The roar of the collapsing ceiling had faded, replaced by the settle of dust and the dripping of unseen water."Cough."I waved my hand in front of my face, trying to clear the air. My lungs burned. The dust tasted like old stone and malice."Runa? Ayaka?"I reached out into the void. My hand brushed against a wall of jagged rock.Blocked.The path behind me was gone. The path to my left was gone. I was in a pocket of air within the rubble."Melody?" I whispered.No answer.My heart began to hammer against my ribs. I was alone. I was F-Rank. And I was trapped in a rigged dungeon with zero mana and the physical resilience of a potato chip.(I'm going to die here. I'm going to starve in the dark.)"Renji..."A groan echoed from the floor a few feet away.I froze."Sae?"I scrambled forward on my hands and knees, ignoring the sharp stones cutting into my palms."Sae! Are you okay?"I found her. She was slumped against the dungeon wall. Her tactic
Chapter 38: The Dungeon Race Challenge
"A death match," I whispered, staring at the black screen of my phone.The strawberry I had been holding fell to the floor.Three days. I had three days to prepare for a fistfight with a man who could punch through a tank."We must strike first!" Runa shouted, drawing her sword and slicing a decorative bush in half. "I will infiltrate his headquarters and challenge him to a duel of honor!""I will bury him in lawsuits," Ayaka growled, typing furiously on her tablet. "I will buy the land his guild stands on and evict him.""I... I can sing him to sleep?" Melody offered, holding a feather duster like a microphone."No," I said, standing up. My legs were shaking, but I leaned against the balcony railing to hide it.A direct fight was suicide. Genjiro was a Tank. He had S-Rank defense. My "Charisma" bluffs worked on people with weak wills or high lust, but Genjiro was a disciplined maniac.I needed to change the rules.Ping.A notification from the Hunter Association popped up.[Official
Chapter 37: The Vice-Captain's Humiliation
The strawberry assassin had fled.But the Seven Stars Guild wasn't known for giving up. They were known for escalating.I sat in the garden of the Saionji Villa, enjoying the fresh air (and the fact that I was now a billionaire). Melody was busy pruning the hedges with her sonic screams."Master," a sultry voice purred from behind the rose bushes.I turned.Standing there was a woman in a skintight black catsuit that looked like it was spray-painted on. She had emerald green hair, predatory eyes, and lips painted a deadly shade of violet.Viper. The real Viper.(Wait. The guy on the roof was a decoy? Or did he just have a really convincing voice changer?)"The Red Mist was a test," Viper smiled, stepping closer. Her hips swayed with a hypnotic rhythm. "You passed. But strawberries are blunt instruments."She licked her lips."I prefer... intimacy."She walked toward me. Every step was calculated to distract.(She is terrifying. And very attractive. But mostly terrifying.)"You are tre
Chapter 36: Trolling the Assassin
"Operation Kindness?"I stared at the screen, suppressing a giggle.The Seven Stars Guild—a ruthless organization of murderers—was currently debating whether to send me a fruit basket or a luxury car to lower my guard.But a billion yen was on the line. I needed to ensure the "hit" happened on my terms.[Anonymous]: "We need a backup plan. If Kindness fails, what is his physical weakness? Does he have an Achilles Heel?"I leaned back against the silk pillows, a devilish grin spreading across my face.(You want a weakness? Fine. I'll give you the stupidest weakness in history.)I typed.[The_Observer]: "The Void is absolute. However, there is one organic compound that destabilizes his core. It is a rare resonance frequency found in nature."[Anonymous]: "What is it? Uranium? Dragon's Blood?"[The_Observer]: "Fragaria × ananassa."[Anonymous]: "That... that is the scientific name for the common strawberry."[The_Observer]: "Precisely. The citric acid structure of the strawberry acts as
Chapter 35: The Financial Crisis
I sat on the edge of the silk bed, staring at my bank account balance on my phone.¥0.I checked my System Interface.[Current Desire Points: 0.]I was the "Saint of Shinjuku." I was the man who slapped a Siren Queen and scared a Guild Master. I was living in a villa that cost more than a small island.And I couldn't afford a pack of gum."This is dignified," I muttered, rubbing my temples. "Truly the lifestyle of a Sovereign."Knock. Knock."Renji?" Ayaka’s voice drifted through the connecting door. "I brought you some... recovery supplements. And a platinum credit card. Just in case you need to buy a country."(Take it. Take the card. Buy the country.)My hand reached out instinctively.Then I stopped.If I took her money, the power dynamic shifted. I would be the "kept man." The "Sovereign" persona relied on being untouchable, unbuyable, and superior.If I became her dependent, the System would probably penalize me with a title like "Trophy Husband" and debuff my charisma."Keep yo
Chapter 34: Poison in the Water
"Poison!"The word hung in the steam-filled air, heavy and terrifying.The water around my waist wasn't just purple; it was viscous. It clung to my skin like oil."Nngh..."Sae Kirishima, who was trembling in my arms, suddenly went limp. Her head lolled back against my shoulder, her eyes unfocused."Renji... my limbs... I can't feel them..."I looked around.Ayaka had collapsed against the rock wall of the pool. Her towel had slipped, but she was too paralyzed to care. Her chest heaved, fighting for air."Renji..." she wheezed. "It burns..."Runa was face down in the water."Runa!"Melody dragged her up by the hair, keeping her head above the toxic sludge. Even the Siren, with her monstrous physiology, looked pale. Her gills were fluttering frantically."Master..." Melody gagged. "The water... it tastes like death."I stood in the center of the carnage.I waited for the paralysis. I waited for my lungs to seize up.Nothing happened.[System Alert: Toxin Detected 'Hydra's Blood'.] [Sta
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