All Chapters of The Ultimate Epic Fail Influencer: Chapter 71
- Chapter 80
94 chapters
Chapter 70
The flattery had done its work. Warren Whitaker's chest swelled as he strode through the factory grounds, chin lifted at an angle that broadcast satisfaction to anyone watching. The cluster of mid-level managers trailing behind him had spent the morning layering praise upon praise, and the result was a man who walked like he owned not just the factory but the earth beneath it.Then his gaze drifted toward the far end of the lot, where a knot of people had gathered near the south gate. His brow creased."What's going on over there? Why is it so crowded, are those police cruisers?"The managers closed ranks around him like iron filings drawn to a magnet. Director Grimes, who possessed an almost supernatural talent for reading the room, stepped forward first."It's the new temp security guard," Grimes said, his tone measured but weighted with implication. "Chief Briggs hired him under your standing authorization. The man's only been here a day, but he's already caus
Chapter 71
The pinned comment from the department's official channel hit Sam's stream like a thunderclap.The message glowed at the top of the chat, highlighted and impossible to miss: "We can confirm that we received a report yesterday. After reviewing surveillance footage, the elderly man slipped and fell on his own. The family has since personally thanked the individual who rendered aid. That individual has been positively identified as Sam Sparks. A model citizen and a Gen Z role model."The stream erupted. Comments poured in so fast the screen became an unreadable blur of white text cascading over the video feed. Thousands of viewers who had been holding their breath suddenly found themselves typing with trembling fingers."Everything Sam did was real?""He was still out there saving people after his stream ended?""This wasn't staged? Not for clicks?""Sam is built different, holy hell."Across Ravenport, indie creators and content accounts froze in fro
Chapter 72
The moment Joel finished speaking, the entire room erupted again. Nobody expected him to choose self-destruction, and certainly nobody expected him to try dragging others down with him.Director Grimes was practically glowing on the inside. He'd been locked in a quiet turf war with Sam's uncle over a promotion slot for months now, and Joel had just handed him the ammunition to eliminate a rival without lifting a finger.The silence that followed only seemed to embolden Joel. His grin stretched wider, ugly and triumphant. "What's the matter? Or does our esteemed plant manager have a double standard?" He swept his gaze across the room, voice dripping with mockery. "All that talk about zero tolerance for nepotism, about running a clean operation, was that just lip service? Something pretty to put in a memo?"Warren Whitaker opened his mouth, then closed it. The other supervisors exchanged stunned looks, none willing to be the first to speak.Sam's brow furrowed. He
Chapter 73
The words had barely left Sam's mouth before every sound in the room died, as though someone had reached into the air itself and strangled it silent.Warren Whitaker stood frozen, one hand still resting on the back of his father's chair, knuckles whitening against the polished wood. Director Grimes looked like someone had cracked an egg over his head, lips parting, clamping shut, parting again as blood drained from his face before rushing back in a violent flush that crawled from collar to ear tips. His jaw worked uselessly, producing nothing but the faint click of teeth meeting teeth."What... when did I ever say that?" Grimes sputtered, his voice cracking like ice under sudden weight. "You... this is slander!" He jabbed a trembling finger toward Sam, words tumbling over each other in a frantic pile-up. "He's making it up, every single word of it!"Warren's brow furrowed in a slow, dangerous tightening as he turned to regard his subordinate. The confusion in his eyes
Chapter 74
Sam could barely contain himself, after everything he'd been through tonight, the quest was actually complete. The timer, the chaos, the warehouse, the thieves, and the near-death moments had all led to this single notification hovering at the edge of his awareness, waiting to be claimed."Wonder what the reward's going to be this time," he muttered, keeping his voice low enough that the stream wouldn't pick it up clearly.His previous System Rewards had been nothing short of ridiculous: God-Tier Luck, God-Tier Swimming, God-Tier Reflexes. Each one had saved his life at least once in the span of a few days. But right now, he didn't need another supernatural ability. What he needed was cold, hard cash. His livestream earnings were still locked behind a waiting period, and his bank account had dwindled to a number so pathetic he refused to check it twice. A car would be nice. An apartment would be better. He'd take a stack of gold bars at this point."This event took fo
Chapter 75
The moment Sam stepped through the door, they were already at his throat, words flying from every direction, overlapping and cutting each other off in their eagerness to land first. Aunt Peggy was the worst of them, voice pitched high enough to shatter glass, spittle flying with every syllable. She wasn't speaking so much as performing, her entire body animated by a righteous fury clearly rehearsed long before Sam arrived.The chat erupted in real time."Sam hasn't even made it past the doorway and they're already going off?""I don't think he's gonna bother with pleasantries this time.""How many people are in there, is this a trial?""The fact that Sam survived growing up in this environment is honestly impressive."Every face in that living room wore the same expression, contempt and smug superiority barely concealed behind thin masks of familial concern. It was written across their features as clearly as ink on paper, exactly how little they thought
Chapter 76
Sam couldn't help it. He laughed.The three voices had come shrieking in almost perfect unison, shrill enough to rattle the windows, and he'd caught the thread immediately. He tilted his head, still grinning, and let the realization settle for the audience before he said a word."I was wondering who could possibly be this classless." He let the pause hang just long enough. "Turns out she's your daughter. Well, that explains everything."The chat erupted. Comments poured in so fast the screen became a blur of white text.CookieMuncher: Makes perfect sense now. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.TangerineDream: Like mother, like daughter. Genetics really said copy-paste.LeftMeRight: This is what happens when nobody in the family owns a mirror.CloudWanderer: Proof that home training matters more than any degree.Aunt Peggy's face flushed a deep, mottled scarlet. She jabbed a finger toward the phone like she could reach through the screen
Chapter 77
The relatives who had been in the wrong just moments ago somehow straightened their spines all at once, as though they were the ones who had been wronged.The chat erupted."Wait, he's actually disowning him?""I'm watching this and I'm genuinely furious right now.""The other relatives mock Sam and he says nothing, but the second Sam talks back, suddenly he notices?""You know what, maybe it's for the best. At least Sam will finally be free."Viewers were seething behind their screens. Alex Cheek stared wide-eyed at Marshall Sparks, disbelief written across every line of his face."Are you serious right now? They just dragged Sam through the mud," Alex said, his voice cracking with indignation, "and you want him to apologize?""Shut your mouth," Aunt Peggy shrieked, jabbing a finger in his direction. "Outsiders don't get a say in family business."Joel Sparks leaned back with a smirk, the picture of magnanimity. "Look, Sam, I don't actua
Chapter 78
She announced it like a trophy, pitching her voice loud enough to carry through the entire living room while cutting her eyes toward Sam with exaggerated, taunting little glances, daring him to object. Her daughter, the supposed manager of some upscale coffee shop, heard the arrangement and let out a self-satisfied chuckle."Alright then, get your things together. You can move in tonight."Marshall didn't show a flicker of hesitation or guilt. If anything, he seemed pleased. In his mind, his own son was nothing more than a directionless dropout glued to his phone doing livestreams, incapable of holding down a real job. Far better to bring the relatives in and present the neighbors with a picture of familial harmony.The chat exploded."Is this man even human? His son hasn't stepped out yet and he's already giving the room away.""I'm so angry my liver hurts.""If I didn't already know Sam was a massive influencer, I'd have lost it ages ago.""Just
Chapter 79
"Since none of you believe me," Sam said, his tone light and unhurried, "why don't we make a bet?" He let the words hang in the air for a moment, watching the guards shift uncomfortably in their pressed uniforms. "If it turns out I'm not a resident here, you can call the cops, have me detained, put me on a wanted list for all I care. I won't run." He paused, tilting his head slightly. "But if I am a resident..." His gaze swept across the group of security guards, and the corner of his mouth lifted just enough to be noticed. "Then whatever luggage I brought with me, you gentlemen carry it upstairs for me. Sound fair?" The guards exchanged uncertain glances. There was something about the way this kid spoke, something too calm, too measured for someone who was supposed to be bluffing. He didn't fidget. He didn't raise his voice. He just stood there with his hands in his pockets like he already knew how this was going to end. The lead guard clenched his jaw