2026-03-24 08:39:17
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Chapter 130
Me: Kylan, listen. A three-headed snake-dragon is coming to my border in forty-eight hours. I’ve got the Power Ranger gear, I’ve got the visors, but I don't have the 'Soul Food.' Send me some of those mana-steaks. I need my team to feel like they’re eating at a 5-star bistro before they die/win.Kylan The Chef: Done. I’ll fire up the Golden Skillet. In exchange, I want more 'KOK.' And if you have any of those wet-wipes left... The forest doesn't have Charmin, Arthur. It’s brutal out here.Me: You better make it quick dude! I'll add some surprising pops and maybe some conditioner and deodorant.Kylan The Chef: ...A faint, predatory smirk tugged at the corners of my mouth, the kind of look that usually preceded a disaster for someone else. In the dark, clicking machinery of my mind, a lie began to sizzle and take shape, seasoned with just enough desperation to be believable.I didn't just want a meal; I wanted something that tasted like effort and felt like an apology. If I played my c
Chapter 129
"The Gorgon-Wyrm doesn't have a chance," I sassed, taking a celebratory bite of a cold rib. "It’s coming to a fight, but I’m turning it into a Dinner Party."Me: KOK is something your realm hasn't tasted yet. So, can I have your Luminous Aether-Cap?Kylan The Chef: In exchange for something I'm not even sure what kind of item? I'm not stupid. I’m a Glow-Worm, not a charity.Wow! This guy has some trust issues. So I took a picture of the KOK and attached it.Me: Fine, I'll take a picture… Sending… [Picture Attached: Click the link below.]I waited…maybe to him it was a god-tier item! “Ha! I’ll be bartering it with the mushroom, Eto wanted so much, maybe I can give it to the old man,” I murmured and ate some cookies.Kylan The Chef: Holy fuck! Are you from Earth, Arthur?What the hell? Someone recognized…Jesus! Suddenly my heart beat so fast my finger trembled.Me: Oh my fucking shit! Yes, and you… damn it, please tell me I'm not alone.Kylan The Chef: Yes! This is OMG! This is surpris
Chapter 128
My eyes widened. "Legendary King? Okay, the rumors are definitely outrunning the reality at this point," I muttered, grinning like a madman. "I’m a merchant with a tight leather suit and a Netflix addiction, but if the Hestia Realm thinks I’m King Arthur, who am I to ruin the branding?"I noticed the energy signature. Ursula’s light was a brilliant, blinding neon yellow-pink, it was ‘Look at me!’ energy. But this Kylan The Chef? His light was deep, stable, and carried a brightness that felt... familiar. Like he was part of the same ‘Core Operating System’ as my own power.I leaned back, tapping into my inner Patrick Jane. If a God-Chef from the Realm of the Hearth is sliding into your DMs, you don't play hard to get. You play the "Legend."Me: Yes, I am the King. And yes, I am awesome. You’ve reached the CEO of the Athens Southern Territory. Who are you, Kylan The Chef? Are you the guy in charge of the divine stir-fry, or are you just a fan of my 'Relic-Grade' hotdogs?I smirked, th
Chapter 127
I fainted again. This time, I had a goofy, lopsided smile on my face that even the "Red-Ranger" visor couldn't hide.Barnaby and Herbert stood over us, their mirrored visors reflecting the ridiculous scene."Should we help him?" Herbert asked, poking my limp, red-leathered arm."Nah," Barnaby sassed, checking the safety on his Yellow-Ranger rifle. "He’s been working hard. Let him enjoy the 'Tactical Comfort.' Besides, the Gorgon-Wyrm is still two days away. He’s got time for one more nap."Elsa just sighed, her face turning a shade of pink that matched her suit. "He really is... the most awkward merchant in any realm."*****I woke up on the velvet sectional with the grace of a flipped turtle. My "CEO-Red" leather suit was still so tight it felt like a full-body hug from an over-enthusiastic python, but the "Bliss-Coma" had finally worn off.The suite was quiet, save for the hum of the AC and the distant sound of Barnaby and Herbert practicing "Sentai Poses" in the hallway. On the ma
Chapter 126
The "..." bubble appeared instantly. My screen began to glow with a soft, rose-tinted light that smelled—I kid you not—like expensive jasmine and high-end mahogany.Ursula: A 'Magnetic' personality, Arthur? My, my. The Venus realm is usually so... loud. But a merchant who understands the tactical value of beauty? That is rare. I have exactly what you need: [THE APHRODITE VANGUARD COLLECTION].Ursula: It is weave-spun from silk-steel and enchanted with 'Admiration Aura.' It scales with the wearer's stats. But... it’s not cheap. It costs 1.2 million VP and a 'Sample' of your Southern KOK. For research, of course.What the heck?1.2 million VP? That was almost my entire war chest. But for a full-team Relic-Grade wardrobe that scaled with stats? That wasn't an expense; it was an investment."She wants the KOK, Elsa!" I shouted, pumping my fist. "She’s hooked! The bubbles are working!""Master, please stop calling the relic soda that," Elsa pleaded.I turned back to the phone, my thumbs mo
Chapter 125
For three days, I did nothing but laze around.The Southern Territory suite was a masterpiece of "Merchant Chic." I had the AC cranked down to a crisp 16°C, a temperature that would have made a Gothic Duke’s toes fall off, but for me, it was paradise. I was splayed across the velvet sectional like a fallen conqueror, dressed in my lucky oversized basketball jersey and mesh shorts, crumbs of a frosted strawberry Pop-Tart decorating my chest like edible medals of honor.Patrick Jane had finally closed the case. Red John was toast. I had binged three entire manga series until my retinas felt like they were vibrating. I was at peak relaxation, a state of high-performance laziness that only 1.5 million VP can buy."Master," Elsa sighed from her mahogany desk, the scratch of her quill against a ledger sounding like a rhythmic judgment. "The 'Tactical Volume' of your lip has subsided, your diction has returned to its usual level of unearned confidence, and yet you are currently using a 'R
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