Taking in a deep breath, Alexander had tried to forget everything that happened between him and Elena yesterday, but no matter how hard he tried, everything still gnawed at him.
He had wanted them to have at least one good memory before he left, he had even tried to have a conversation with her, but she was still so hung up on her first love that everything had gone downhill. His attempt at leaving peacefully, and making sure that she knew of his movement had ended in nothing, but his banishment from the house with Elena telling him that he would have to kneel if he wanted to come back. “Very funny.” He scoffed as he tried to get his luggages out of the taxi he had bought. He looked around the open space, and it didn’t take long for him to spot Julian, although Julian hadn’t seen him yet. He smiled to himself, and when he was ready, he hauled his luggages towards Julian, his friend caught sight of him and immediately rushed towards him. Alex moved with a calm resolve that masked the storm still raging inside him, shoulders squared despite the fact that his bruises from when he had put his life on the line for Elena still hurts. “Alex! I can’t believe you came, oh my god!” Julian’s excitement was evident in his voice as he rushed to meet his friend, and handed him a cup of coffee. “I know the weather is hot, but I figured you’d need this to wake you right up….” Julian’s voice trailed off when he took in the sight of Alex, “looks like I was right.” He added as he clicked his teeth. “What the hell… you look like you’ve been through a war zone already. And why the bags? You’re not seriously—” “I am.” Alex cut in before Julian could finish talking, and together, they both made their way into a tent that had a cluttered desk piled with medical supply lists and faded maps. When they got in, Alex dropped his things on the floor carefully before sinking into the chair that Julian had pulled out for him, and not long after, Julian joined right in front of him. The silence between them stretched as Alex took in his surroundings, his hands steady on his knees even as faint tremors lingered in his fingers from the night before. Julian leaned forward, rubbing a hand over his stubbled jaw, confusion etching deep lines across his forehead. “Are you sure this is really what you want to do?” He asked, and Alex sighed. “I mean, look at you, man. You’re not packed like a man with the intention of returning, you’re packed as if you’ve already made up your mind to die at war.” Julian went on, but Alex stayed quiet. He wasn’t really ready to talk about it, but he knew that he was going to sooner or later, but for now, he needed everything he could get to keep his mind off Elena. “I might actually die there, remember?” Alex laughed, and Julian only stared at him with careful scrutiny before shrugging. “Well, you’re not wrong, that might happen.” Julian sighed, and Alex forced a laugh as he took a sip of his coffee, he couldn’t believe that after so many years, Julian still remembered how he took his coffee. “I hate it when you go all quiet like this!” Julian said, slapping Alex’s lap. “You just got back, but that doesn’t mean you can’t talk to me. What happened?” Alexander met Julian’s gaze, his voice low but firm, each word measured as if he didn’t want to waste any more of his words. “That’s what I have to do, Julian. I need my exit to be clean.” He paused, forcing a faint, rueful smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I just wanted to remove every memory of myself from that place, you know, so there wouldn’t be much of me there for her to be hung up on. I don’t want her to be reminded of me by my personal belongings.” I finished. Julian blinked, leaning back in his creaky chair, utterly baffled, but Alex trusted him enough to know that he wouldn’t judge or try to push him any more than he already has. For the longest moment, neither of them said anything to each other as they both sat and took in the quiet. Soon, Alex broke the silence. “So? What’s going to happen?” He asked. Julian sighed, rubbing his fingers through his rough hair. “I can see that you’re already ready for the next step, you’ve made up your mind.” He paused. “Whatever is going on between you and Elena, I won’t ask you anymore about it, but I need you to know that the village we’re heading to is not only ravaged with disease, but it’s also underdeveloped and they lack basic medical knowledge.” Julian explained. Raising a brow, Alex nodded as he listened very attentively. “You already told me that over the phone.” Alex pointed out, and Julian shook his head. “I might have downplayed it a little because I desperately wanted you to join. You can’t blame me, I miss you, we all do, you’re our most talented doctor, man.” Julian replied, and Alex couldn’t hold back his laugh. “Fine, so tell me the full story. I need to know what I’m walking into because I already decided not to change my mind.” Alex said, and Julian’s happiness could rub off on nearly everyone. “Great!” Julian started. “Anyway, it’s a war zone, you know that, and god, there is Cholera outbreaks, malaria there is thick as a fucking fog, and the war breathing down our necks.” Julian let out an exhausted sigh. “There are rebel skirmishes on the borders, no reliable supply lines. I can’t believe I’m saying this again, but you really could die out there. You sure you want to run straight into that fire right after… this?” Julian asked. Alex nodded, his jaw tightening as he rose to his feet, grabbing his bags with a firm grip that whitened his knuckles. The weight felt grounding, an anchor to something real. “I’m sure, Julian. Warn all you want, but I need to leave immediately. No more delays.” Julian studied him for a moment, then sighed as he stood up too, clapping a hand on Alex’s shoulder with full respect. “Alright, we’ll leave very soon. Let’s go tackle those bastards.” He laughed. Julian called out to some men who loaded the bags into the vehicle, and not long after, the journey began. Alex already knew it was going to take days before he arrived at the location. But since they were leaving now, they would be so far gone before Elena knew, and that’s if she cared enough to think about him. He shook his head to stop himself from thinking too much. Night fell while they were still on the road, but they didn’t stop. The vibration of Alex’s phone jolted him out of his thoughts, and he picked it up to see that it’s a call from Elena. He stared at the name and photo that appeared, and his chest tightened, but when a text message came through, he knew for sure that he made the right choice. ‘Ready to apologize to Marcus yet? I changed my mind. You can come home now, but you’ll have to kneel and beg for forgiveness like I said.’ A deep sigh escaped his lips, raw and exhausted. That was who she cared about. Not him. Never really him. His thumb hovered, but he didn’t pick the call or even reply to the text. With a final decisive motion, he switched the phone off, staring out into the darkness for a moment before turning to Julian as he spoke. “I can’t wait to finally get back out there and put my skills to use.”Latest Chapter
049.
“Ma’am. We’re here, ma’am.” The driver’s voice jolted Elena out of the thought she was completely lost in. She’d been thinking of how it was possible for Alex to know someone like Liesel Taylor, and that had caused her to lose complete track of how long they’d been driving.“Wh—What?” She muttered, she still couldn’t believe that Alex had chosen to stay in that place instead of coming back with her.From the snippet she’d seen, she already knew just how dangerous it was in that place and Alex had chosen the perfect, peaceful home she had made for him over a place like that?The thought of it made her stomach churn as she kept telling herself that she wasn’t worried about him, she couldn’t possibly be. She doesn’t care if he lived or died in that place, but there was still a small part of her that felt responsible for him.A part of her that kept recalling that he had no family, no home. If he died in that place, they wouldn’t have anyone to call except her, and she doesn’t want to go
048.
Alex looked around to see if anyone else was going to say anything about his personal life, as much as he enjoyed the fact that neither of the people working for him thought of Elena as an important enough figure for them to respect, he also wouldn’t have them talking down on her.That was the difference between him and Elena, when she could have defended him in the past, when she could have told the people who insulted him both to his face and behind his back, she kept quiet.He wasn’t going to do that or that would just make him the exact same person as Elena. He wouldn’t defend her, but he was going to stop them from talking down at her.“Anyone?” He asked firmly, looking around, but everyone around knew that they dared not say another word about Elena. “Good.” He muttered.The tent fell silent so completely that the distant crack of small-arms fire outside sounded suddenly louder.Alex exhaled once, slowly, and the personal weight dropped from his shoulders like a coat he no longe
047.
“Get your filthy hands off me!” Elena screamed, twisting hard against the two soldiers who had already closed in on both sides of her.She hadn’t expected that Alex was going to have her thrown out the way he just did. Her plan had been foolproof to her, she’d thought that all she had to do was act as though she regretted all those years.Maybe she didn’t regret those years, maybe she really wanted him to come back with her, but the last thing she wanted was to seem like the desperate one.Alex was the one that was supposed to be desperate, he was the one that was supposed to be searching far and wide for her because he wanted her forgiveness. It shouldn’t be the other way around.Her voice cracked like glass under pressure as she looked around her. “Who the hell does he think he is? Alex—look at me!” She snapped, not caring that she was causing a scene and Alex was preparing to do something important.“You think you can just throw me out like trash after everything? If you came with
046.
“But, we don’t have enough—”“I won’t hear it.” Alex cut in before the soldier could finish, his eyes not leaving Elena even for a second. “You don’t expect me to leave a citizen here, she could die, and you know damn well that I won’t let that happen, especially if it’s a death I can prevent.”The soldier didn’t say anything as he looked away from Alex for a second to look at Julian in hopes that Julian would explain the situation to Alex, but Julian shook his head.They’d all known Alex enough to know that if he made his mind up about something, to get him to change it back would be difficult.Alex’s eyes studied Elena, he hadn’t seen her like this before. Her expensive clothes were already filthy, and fine dust coated her hair and the tracks of tears on her cheeks.She had never known hunger before, never seen war either. The closest she had ever come to danger was a late dinner reservation and a driver who ran a red light.But now, the ground itself was trying to throw her off her
045.
“OH MY GOD!” Elena screamed, and even Alex looked at her, he could tell that she was in shock. Her face had gone completely white, eyes wide and unblinking as the second blast’s aftershock rolled through the ground beneath their feet. “Wh—What the hell is going on?” She screamed again, the sound of her voice barely carrying over the blasting. Her heart was already in her throat, fear had made it almost impossible for her to move or do anything else.“What does it look like?!” Julian, who was already really annoyed, snapped back at her. Ever since he heard about how she treated his best friend, every ounce of respect and platonic affection he had for her was completely gone.Dust boiled up in thick gray clouds as shouts cut through the ringing in his ears—orders barked in three languages, the high sharp cries of the wounded, the heavy thud of boots on packed earth.Everywhere was chaotic as soldiers moved in tight clusters, herding civilians and staff toward the reinforced bunkers dug
044.
Alex shook his head, he couldn’t deny that the fact that she couldn’t answer the question had hurt, but he always knew that Elena would never choose him over Marcus.He didn’t even know why he had asked the question in the first place, but maybe it was because there was still a part of him that hoped she would make that choice.Alex had no idea Julian was already beside him until he felt the firm hand on his shoulder, squeezing as if to let him know that he still had a bit of support from his friend.Looking at Julian, Alex forced a smile at him and nodded. And just as he turned away from Elena because he needed to be as far away from her as he could be.If he spent another second with her, he would lose his mind and that wasn’t something he could afford right now. He was a doctor, a surgeon, he needed a clear mind.And this place was still a war ground, there could be an attack on this base or on the citizens outside it, and he had to be very clearheaded so that he could make good de
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