Demons

"Wah!"

I was in bed and it seemed like I had just woken up from a nightmare.

I quickly glanced at my body. There were no wounds or any signs of blood. I turned my head to the left and saw the same scenery I always see outside my apartment- dark, dirty, and shady.

"Is this... my apartment?"

My head was in a quell. There were a lot of things going inside my head.

"How am I still alive? I am pretty sure I died back then. How did I even get here? Normally, people would ignore my dead body. Who brought me here?"

<Ah. I see that you are awake.>

"Uwah!"

The sudden voice in my head made me stumble and fall headfirst on the floor. It hurt. I almost lost the sensation of pain after my parents' death. When I jumped from my school building and crashed onto the ground, my body reacted to the pain but not my mind. It seems like I was revitalized now that I can feel pain.

"Who... who are you?" I asked with my face full of horror.

<Me? I am you.>

The gentle voice said.

Confusion befell my mind. I tried to ask what he meant by that but I suddenly felt the impel to not say anything. It was more of a prediction than a gut feeling. I felt in my bones that if I spoke anything to the voice inside my head, then my body would be ripped to pieces in an instant. I might have wished for death before but not anymore, at least, until I know the goal of the voice.

I waited and waited to see what would happen and I hit the bullseye.

My vision went white and I found myself in a surreal space. The space was pure white and quiet, not even a tinge of impurity or sound. It was serene and singing the songs of tranquillity. An oblivious sweet scent lingered at the edges of my body. It was pleasant. But. This pleasantness was not the one meant for me. It was a disguise. A veil meant to deceive. It was exceedingly disgusting. The disgust and malice of whoever created this space were like an open book to me. Maybe the last three years of being an outcast and careful observation of people's intentions made my senses good when we are talking about these kinds of situations. I knew that whatever was going to happen in this space will not be good news to me. I was feeling the urge to throw up, to frown in disgust but I didn't since I still didn't know what would happen if I were to make a wrong move. What the hell was up with this place?

Another session of waiting, still expecting something to happen, and once again I was right.

A brushing sound came from behind me. I turned around.

A beautiful lady wearing the clothes you usually see Greek Goddesses wearing, with white-blonde hair running down to her waist stood before me.

She looked at me with a gentle face, a face that was kind and compassionate.

"Lan?" Her voice was full of repose.

"..."

I had no words for this lady. The coat that covered her tone and her gaze were painfully obvious. And I was not the "Lan" she was looking for.

"No, you are not Lan. Who are you?" A frown appeared on the lady's lips as I was an intruder.

Her eyes started to glow in bright gold. I felt thousands of hateful eyes creeping up my back. The whole space changed in an instant. Her beauty turned into disgust and I knew just from her look that it was her who made this place. It was now an ominous blood-red space with all kinds of malicious fleeting thoughts wailing from somewhere.

"So this what you have prepared for me, Rena?"

I hurriedly turned around and saw a man. To be honest, the first feeling I got when I saw the man was jealousy. The man was excruciatingly handsome. To word it more precisely, the man was handsome as the demons. Anyway, the blood-red space completely disappeared without a trace and it reverted to the disgust-in-disguise-of-purity visual.

"If I was not here then you would have chopped this boy and would have feasted on him, right? Just like you did with us."

"What are you sayin~g, Lan? That was a mistake on my part."

Despite her seductive voice, I could feel the extent of hate and anguish she held towards the man. But even more than that, the name of the woman continuously resounded inside my head. Rena was the name of the Goddess who governed our world. And this woman shared the same name. This is just a coincidence... right?

"Mistake? Hahahahahahahahaha!"

Why was he laughing so maniacally?

"It's been so long that I have heard such a funny joke. Mistake, you say?"

The laughing face of Lan suddenly turned grim and serious.

"Don't fuck with me. I haven't forgotten how you slaughtered everyone and feasted on their meat, you fuckin' Goddess!"

Goddess...?

"They were Demons, so as a Goddess, I didn't have a choice." The lady shrugged.

"So you Divine beings just go and make rules based on who are we?"

"..."

"What were our sins? What did we do to receive that kind of treatment?" Even though the man put up a face that seemed to know everything, he asked with a grave tone.

"Nothing. You lot were just unsightly." The lady put her hand on her chin and stared at the man with narrowed eyes.

But what did she mean by "unsightly"? More importantly, who was she? Who was this man? What kind of relationship did these two have? And... what did the man mean by "feasted on their meat"?

"Haha... I can't believe how shameless you can be, Rina."

"I am pretty confident in my memory and I am certain I told you not to put my name on your filthy tongue."

"Fuckin' bitch..."

"Whatever... I just wanted to make sure but it seems like you have really woken up. I don't know how but don't worry, you will go back to where you belong soon."

"Right... we will see."

There was nothing for me to do here except just stand and listen. Even though I was Potential-less, these two were like giants to me... giants which cannot be taken down even if I was given a hundred lives.

The lady, who, I was pretty sure, was the Goddess, inclined to leave but stopped halfway and turned towards me.

"Oh, and I remember that boy now. You truly did a great deed at being miserably pathetic. I never had a chance to be bored when I was watching you~ You truly were splendid."

What...?

"Spreading the news about the only Potential-less throughout Earth was a bit of a task but it was worth it. I had a great time watching writhe in agony and desperately holding onto life. And the way you were ostracized was simply a feast for my eyes. Well, that's just how humans are."

I was discomposed.

"... what happened to me was... all your doing?"

"Ye~s. And all it took was denying your Potential. And spreading your name."

I felt my heart shatter to pieces. I never felt this sensation since the moment my body came to life. Was it anguish? Or was it lifelessness? Was it despair? Or was it sorrow? There is no appropriate word to describe this feeling. All I knew was that I was feeling something extreme, impeccable, and transcendent.

"...tch."

"I didn't get you."

"You fuckin' bitch!!"

I burst out in anger and rushed at the grinning Goddess. For her enjoyment, only for her enjoyment, she made a complete mess of my life. How am I supposed to forgive this bitch? I was alone, I was ostracised, I was trodden over, I was beaten, I endured, I moved on hoping things would get right, for what? Only to hear this? No. I can't accept this.

"DIE YOU BITCH!"

Whoosh!

I punched her, but the catch is that she disappeared the moment I touched her. All that was left was her fleeting voice.

"Please show more of your miserable self..."

"FUCK YOU, YOU MOTHER FUCKING BITCH!!!!!!!!"

Her voice disappeared.

My knees gave in and fell to my knees. For the first time in 3 years after my parents' death, I let my rage go wild. I was left with frustration and desperation for her blood.  I cried and cried and cried like a baby. The feelings which I have buried deep inside myself in the last 3 years burst out altogether.

Lan was quietly standing behind me, watching me as cry my bawls out. I could feel his sympathy on my back. Though he made no visible actions, his gentle gaze was enough to calm me down.

I stood up from where I was and faced Lan and he faced me too. Tears were still rolling down my cheeks but now was not the time for that. His eyes were deep like the abyss and as Nietzsche said,

"If you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back at you."

And he seemed like the personification of that statement.

"So... can you tell me about these demons and stuff."

"This will take some time."

"We have time. But first of all, who are you?"

"I am Lan, a demon..."

"That doesn't tel-"

"... and I am you."

***