I gasped back to reality, plummeting from the dream world and returning to my body. Within my hysteria, I fell off the bed and landed in a pile on the floor where Deshawn once rested. Where was he? What was that? 

"Now you know why I hate Marco," Deshawn admitted. I saw that he was sitting on the edge of my bed, a longing look plastered to his face as he looked down on me but I knew he was thinking about his ex-best friend.

Both of my wrists each had the name, Reniella De Vega written on it. Perfectly centered and readable, not dreaming.

"I need to talk to him then," I stated. Marco had an obvious dislike towards Deshawn, a dislike I needed to explore. 

"I'm not letting you talk to him when he could potentially be my killer."

"You really think he could have killed you?" I queried while sitting up and leaning against the cool wall. The back of my neck prickled with sweat from the dream and my breaths escaped raggedly. 

"Yes. Yes, I do."

I barely slept that night, I barely slept any night, but this time it was different. Usually, when I didn't sleep it was because my mind swirled with everything and nothing at the same time. Thousands of conversations, memories, and people blurred into an uncontrollable mess. A buzz would stick to my ears like glue and when the sunlight poked through my curtains, I felt mocked. 

This time, I was silent. I didn't slip in and out of sleep. I didn't see faces or hear voices. I just stayed awake, staring at the ceiling and admiring the rough design. My head didn't hurt, my ears didn't ring and my body felt paralyzed. I was just awake. 

When Raven woke up at around 9:30, she hobbled to the shower. My grandmother was still asleep and my father had left for work at 10:00 so as I waited for Raven to return, silence blanketed my bedroom. Deshawn was nowhere to be seen but my heart still pounded from the dream. Marco's face after he said the word, Deshawn's deflated reaction, the ringing noise of the canteen. I couldn't rid the feeling of disappointment that was shed from his body as he walked away from Marco. It was like he'd almost expected it, most certainly not surprised by the outburst but effectively pissed off. 

I sat on my bed and ran my fingers through my messy bed hair. My hazel eyes were heavy from lack of sleep but I couldn't take a nap. Especially not now as I was awake fully and my room was filled with the natural light outside.

Raven soon returned and stole one of my hoodies to put on. Like routine, she brushed her hair quickly while peering through the window. 

"Mom's car just passed if you want to come over to my house? I could read your cards if you want, could be fun," Raven suggested and shrugged her shoulders. I watched while she threw her hair onto a loose bun at the top of her head and stuck her tongue out in the mirror with concentration.

"As much as I believe your soul reading stuff-"

She cut me off with a giggle and threw herself onto my body. We descended onto the bed in a fit of loud laughs and plush pillows. "Please be gentle with my poor self. I'm just a young Pisces, we're sensitive." She sighed dramatically into my ear.

"I know, babe," I said breathlessly as Raven lay on my chest and constricted my lungs. 

The smell of vanilla enveloped us and even though she crushed me under her weight, I could've stayed like that forever. I felt so safe, so loved, and perfectly normal. Nothing about my life was normal but having a best friend and messing around after a sleepover was. I loved that. 

"You sure you don't want to come over?" she mumbled against my jumper as I patted her hair softly. "We haven't been to visit the infamous Red Valley bakery in a while. The place might go bankrupt soon since we haven't bought those amazing cookies in a hot minute. I swear, we're all that keeps them in business." 

It was difficult to say not to Raven, especially when she tempted me with cookies from the bakery. But, I couldn't go. I was busy figuring out Deshawn. As soon as I got rid of him, I could have all the cookies I wanted

"I can't today." I sighed. "But we'll go soon, okay?" 

Raven huffed playfully and pushed herself off of my body and back onto her feet. She grabbed her phone from my desk and smiled down at me thoughtfully. 

"I'm sorry that you had to see that on New Year's Eve, Rei." She breathed out softly. My heart broke at her expression, so broken and helpless.

"When I saw you that night, I had no idea what was happening. It was so scary like there was nothing I could do to help. You wouldn't let anyone except Ross touch you and all you did was cry and I thought you hated me or something." 

My eyes softened and I sat up. "I don't hate you. I could never hate you, Raven Galan. Even though you annoy the hell out of me, who else would run to my house at early hours in the morning screaming about horoscopes or how your manifestation worked?" 

She laughed, covering her face with her hands as a light coat of pink blossomed at her cheeks.

"I'm so grateful for you, Raven. Seriously." 

She squeaked in response and hid her eyes from me while navigating herself to the bedroom door. "You can't just say things like that and not expect me to cry, Rei!" She whined and I laughed aloud.

"I'm going home now quickly so that I can cry without an audience," she blubbered, still hiding her brown eyes away from me. I could only chuckle along. 

"Thank you for looking after me. I'll see you later and hopefully, less emotional."

Then, she was out of my room and the pitter-patter of her feet on the stairs rang out. The front door was pulled open, slammed shut and she ran to her house down the street.

My phone buzzed with a text, the sound sliced through the quiet. I grabbed it and checked the notification. 

'I barely remember what happened last night but I do know that you gave me a lift so thanks, Bambi :) xx'

"Will you go see Ross, you know, to question him about me?" Deshawn suggested and the bed dipped beside me. 

I'd say I was startled by the sudden sound of his voice in my empty house but the feeling of him was there long before he made himself known.