JIM IS HIM

CHAPTER 05

Jim brought home a bag full of green beans.

[You don’t have to worry about physical condition, Jim.] Anne said. [Just focus on fucking your wife. I’ll take care of the rest.]

“I can’t completely rely on you and do nothing,” Jim blurted. “Even though you claim that you can cure my condition, I will still do everything I can.”

[Hmph, so unnecessarily strong-headed, but I don’t hate that. Bathe first, and then go to your wife.]

“Don’t tell me how to deal with my wife,” Jim growled. “You promised me you’d stay silent when I’m around Rena, so stick to your word.”

[I only promised that I’ll keep silent when you are in the bed with her. Nothing more. Nothing less.]

“Tsk,” Jim really wished he could just pull the ring out and throw it in the toilet.

As he was heading to the kitchen, a short, fat man entered his vision, stroking his pointy mustache. This man was Marc Adams, his father-in-law. If there was anyone who treated him like trash in this house, it would be this man. For some reason Jim couldn’t pinpoint, Marc hated him.

“Jim, why didn’t you wake me up this morning?” Marc asked in a lazy tone as he came downstairs.

Jim looked clueless because waking Marc up wasn’t his job. “What do you mean, sir?”

“My alarm didn’t ring, so shouldn’t you have woken me up?” Marc glared at him. “It’s 11 AM now.”

“So what?” Jim mumbled. “It’s not like you have a job.”

“Ah? What are you murmuring about?” Marc raised his voice as he came closer.

“Nothing,” Jim cleared his throat.

Marc glanced at the bag in his hand. “Beans again? Give me a break. Why do you eat beans all the time?”

“Did I ask you why you eat sweets all the time?” Jim asked back.

Marc’s eyes turned a little red. “Is this how your father taught you to speak with your elders?”

Jim frowned. “Why are you bringing my late father into this? If you have something against me, then tell it straight to my face.”

“Cotton buds,” Marc casually said.

“Pardon?”

“I ran out of cotton buds, and my right ear has been itchy since morning. Why don’t you go out and buy two boxes of cotton buds for me. I want quality ones.”

“Okay,” Jim put his hand forward.

“Hmph,” Marc snorted. “Why are you asking me for money? Go and ask my wife or your wife as usual.”

“Relying on your wife and daughter even at this age,” Jim mumbled as he walked past his father-in-law, and also shook his head. “Some people can never be helped.”

“What did you say?” Marc pulled Jim’s shirt from behind and stopped him.

“I said nothing,” Jim turned back.

“You think I didn’t hear what you said?” Marc raised his hand quickly.

Jim saw the hand coming, but he couldn’t stop it because Anne didn’t let him. As a result, he received a sound slap from Marc. His cheek gained redness pretty quickly.

This wasn’t his first time getting slapped by his father-in-law, but this was definitely the first in many weeks. Naturally, shame filled Jim’s face.

“Don’t forget that you’re just a maid in this house,” Marc’s voice was loud and clear, “whereas I am the husband of the owner of this house. The gap between you and me is greater than the distance between heaven and earth.”

Jim’s jaw hardened.

“It’s been what? Three years since you married my daughter?” Marc said in a sharp tone. “Why do you spend more time in the gym than with my daughter? I can’t help but start to wonder if you’re even capable of having sex. You’re not an eunuch, or are you?”

Jim’s heart skipped a beat. He tried his best to not look tense.

“Maybe, my ‘good’ daughter is shielding you all this while?” Marc added. “I don’t know what exactly is going on between you and Rena, but I’ll bring the truth out soon.”

“We will have kids when we want them,” Jim tried to look confident. “You should mind your own business.”

“But Rena is my daughter,” Marc retorted. “Making sure that my daughter isn’t being tricked by an impotent bastard is also one of my top priorities, Jim. I’m not saying you’re impotent, because you have the body that’s only possible for those with high levels of testosterone, but maybe you’re gay? Who knows? I’ll bring the truth out sooner or later. That’s all I’m saying. Now, go and bring the food for me. I’m so hungry.” He went to the dining table.

Even though Jim didn’t want to serve food to Marc, he had to suppress his emotions and do exactly that. The food was good, yet Marc complained, “Every dish feels bland. You should try new dishes.”

“How about ants fry, sir?” Jim sarcastically asked.

Marc shot up a glance. “Alright. Make Ants Fry for dinner tonight.”

“W-What?” Jim’s eyes widened in shock.

“You have to bear responsibility for every word that comes out of your mouth,” Marc patted Jim’s shoulder. “So make Ants Fry tonight.” He never had the intention to eat the ants fry anyway, but he just wanted Jim to cook the dish and suffer through the whole process. “Oh, and one more thing…” he gestured with his finger for Jim to lean closer.

“What is it?” Jim leaned toward him.

Marc raised his bum sideways and let out a disgusting fart toward his own son-in-law.