Home / Fantasy / Vessel of the Ruined god / Chapter 3: The God Who Loves Pranks
Chapter 3: The God Who Loves Pranks
Author: TRY
last update2026-08-22 10:50:06

Seraphyne didn’t move, though the tip of her blade trembled just a fraction. Vaelric slapped both hands over his mouth, his eyes wide and bulging.

"I didn't—I mean, he didn't—" Vaelric gasped, his voice straining against the invisible weight of the entity.

“This sanctuary of rotted paper is insulting,” the voice projected, vibrating from Vaelric’s throat without him moving his lips. “I require space to stretch. My joints are rusted from a thousand years of confinement in that tomb.”

"Stop it!" Vaelric wheezed, stumbling backward into a pile of decaying encyclopedias. "We’re leaving! Just... stop using my tongue for ventriloquism!"

Seraphyne narrowed her eyes, stepping over a collapsed bookshelf. "Vaelric, if you’re pulling a prank, I’m going to lob off your ears."

"A prank? Look at my face, Seraphyne! Does this look like a prank? I feel like I’m being piloted by a caffeinated titan!"

“Pilot is a crude term. I am a passenger who has decided to take the wheel,” the voice boomed, though this time it sounded slightly more muffled.

"See?" Vaelric shrieked, pointing at his own chest. "He’s talking! He’s in there! He says he’s a passenger, but he feels more like an unwanted roommate who refuses to pay rent!"

Seraphyne sighed, lowering her blade, though she kept it drawn. "An unwanted roommate with a god complex. Great. Just what I needed. Can you turn him off?"

"I don't have an off switch! I have a 'glowing like a nuclear lighthouse' setting and an 'accidental arson' setting. That’s it!"

“The girl is redundant,” the voice echoed. “Tell her to be silent. Her heartbeat is arrhythmic and offensive.”

"You hear that?" Vaelric yelled at the empty air. "You’re offensive! Even the ancient god thinks you’re rhythmically impaired!"

Seraphyne stepped forward, grabbing Vaelric by the collar of his grease-stained coat. "Listen to me, you walking glow-stick. If you don't find a way to silence the voice in your ribs, I’m leaving you to the Jackals. They’ll have a field day dissecting you."

"You wouldn't," Vaelric panted, his hands twitching against his will.

"Try me. I don't get paid enough to babysit a celestial radio station."

Suddenly, Vaelric’s right leg jerked upward with unnatural, fluid speed, kicking a heavy mahogany desk across the room. It smashed into a marble pillar with a deafening crack.

"Whoa! What was that?" Vaelric yelped, trying to pull his leg back down. "I didn't tell my leg to do that!"

“Limbering up. The vessel is stiff. It requires athleticism to contain the Ruin.”

"The Ruin? Is that your name?" Vaelric asked, his balance swaying as his body performed a spontaneous, high-speed pirouette. "Could you maybe, I don't know, Ruin some legos instead of my furniture?"

"Vaelric, stop dancing," Seraphyne groaned, rubbing her temples.

"I’m not dancing! I’m being forced to perform a gymnastic routine for a deity!"

“Perform! Yes. The Vessel must show prowess. The air is stagnant. Move, boy!”

Vaelric’s body launched itself into a series of impossible, jagged leaps, bouncing off the rotting bookshelves like a pinball.

"I'm going to throw up!" Vaelric shouted, mid-air, as his arms locked into a rigid, majestic pose. "Seraphyne, help! He’s making me strike a pose!"

"I’m not helping you with your interpretative dance," she muttered, though she watched with a mix of morbid curiosity and annoyance. "Just find a chair and sit down!"

"I can't! He’s pushing me toward the skylight!"

“The roof offers a better stage for the proclamation of my return.”

"Nobody cares about your return!" Vaelric yelled, finally managing to grab a wooden chair and anchor himself to the floor. The friction caused the floorboards to groan under the sudden, immense force of his grip.

“Your resistance is... amusing, scavenger.”

"I’m a scavenger, he says! You’re just a parasite with a ego!"

"Vaelric," Seraphyne said, her voice dropping to a sharp, dangerous whisper. "Do you hear that?"

The library went deathly silent. The heavy, rhythmic thrumming in Vaelric’s chest suddenly synced with a vibration coming from above. It wasn't the sound of wind or falling debris. It was the wet, clicking thud of something massive.

"Please tell me that’s a bird," Vaelric whispered, his face draining of color.

"That," Seraphyne said, raising her crossbow, "is a Shredder-Beast. And it’s definitely not interested in books."

The ceiling tiles above them exploded. A hulking shape, all glistening muscle and serrated bone, dropped into the center of the library, kicking up a cloud of ancient dust. The beast stood ten feet tall, its face a swirling mass of sensory tendrils that twitched in the direction of the glowing light in Vaelric’s chest.

"It smells you," Seraphyne said, backing toward a doorway. "The core. It’s attracted to the energy."

“An appetizer,” the voice within Vaelric purred, vibrating through his teeth. “Let me handle this, scavenger. Stand back and observe perfection.”

"No! No handling! No perfection!" Vaelric yelled, his feet moving on their own again.

He didn't run away. His body surged forward with terrifying, liquid speed, closing the distance between him and the monster in a heartbeat.

"What are you doing?" Seraphyne shouted, aiming her crossbow at the beast.

"I’m not doing anything! He’s steering!"

The Shredder-Beast lunged, its razor-sharp claws carving trenches into the floor. Just as a blade of bone swung toward Vaelric’s head, his body snapped into a perfectly timed backflip.

"Oh, come on!" Vaelric screamed as he soared through the air, his arms outstretched.

He landed—not on the floor—but squarely on the top of the monster's head. His feet clung to the creature’s chitinous skull like magnets.

"I’m on the monster! I’m on the monster!" Vaelric panicked, grabbing at the creature’s eye-stalks to keep from falling. "Seraphyne, tell me you’re shooting it!"

"I’m trying, but you’re in the way, you idiot!" Seraphyne fired a bolt, but it ricocheted off the beast’s armor.

The creature thrashed, shaking its head violently, trying to dislodge the glowing scavenger.

“Hold firm, vessel. The skull is soft. Crack it.”

"I’m not cracking its skull! I’m a pacifist! A terrified, glowing pacifist!"

The beast reared up, letting out a screech that shattered every remaining window in the library. It began to spin, building up a centrifuge of force that threatened to launch Vaelric into the wall.

"I’m slipping! Seraphyne, grab my hand!"

"I can't reach you!"

Vaelric’s chest glowed with blinding intensity, the veins on his skin pulsating like molten gold. He could feel his own strength failing, but the other presence was surging, feeding on the adrenaline and the violence of the struggle.

His left arm, the one reaching for a handhold on the creature’s neck, began to shift. The skin darkened, thickening into a dense, interlocking pattern of obsidian-colored scales that grew over his knuckles and crept up toward his bicep.

"My arm!" Vaelric gasped, staring in horror as his hand became a clawed, armored limb that dug into the beast’s hide like steel hooks. "Seraphyne, look at my arm!"

She stared, her crossbow lowering in genuine shock. "Vaelric... what are you becoming?"

The beast gave one final, violent jerk, and Vaelric was thrown toward the rafters, his scaled hand leaving a deep, burning gouge in the monster’s flesh as he tore himself free. He crashed into a heavy shelf, sliding down amidst a rain of rotting books.

The Shredder-Beast shrieked again, its focus now entirely on the flickering, terrifying light of the creature that was growing out of Vaelric's body.

“Good,” the voice whispered, colder than a tomb. “Let it fear the Ruin.”

Vaelric looked at his arm. The scales were still spreading, jagged and sharp, clicking against each other with a sound like grinding stone.

"Seraphyne," Vaelric whimpered, his heart pounding in a rhythm that wasn't human. "I think the vitamin is winning."

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