Volume 1 - Gimmindiot World (3) - A stupid weirdo

Keywords: system/kick/emperor/psycho/second chance

-We need you to solve an important problem… Our competitors are catching up to us, prepared chickens aren't enough anymore and our furnace budget is skyrocketing! We need to find an alchemy formula to transform potatoes directly into a cooked chicken!

[…]

He's Merlin.

He's the daughter of Gimmin Diot.

[…]

Then a light flashed in his eyes as he opened his head.

He took his brain as well as his donger, placed it in a bottle, before closing it.

His finger then pointed to the bottles as he seemed to be searching for a particular one.

He found a bottle with a post-it. On it was written "Interesting Assassin".

He opened it, took the brain placed inside it, placed it in his head that he then closed.

[…]

She was an assassin, famous for assassinating an emperor in the middle of a council with his ministers, without anyone seeing it. They called her "the shadow".

And tonight was going to be her night.

The night of the hunt…

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-Ha ha ha!

Laughs were resonating through the inn.

This world still called it inn, but actually, it was a restaurant chain from the neighboring modern world, it was known as Starchuck Coffee.

While the place was indeed part of a chain of restaurants from a more technologically advanced world, it was still built locally, and the wood planks on its floor told that story.

-Guys, we need to celebrate my promotion! Everything's on me!

-Yaaaayyy!

Starchuck usually mainly served coffee, juice, and soda as drinks, but tonight, everyone drank beer, strong wine, and two particulars alcohols named with elegance: the hole opener and the intestine dissolver.

The man at the center of this celebration was the one who came to see Rald a bit earlier the same day.

While they were celebrating, a shadow was silently watching them, invisible, but closer to them than what they could imagine…

[…]

This was the last one.

-Kh!

A muffled cry was soon followed by gurgling, as blood spurt out of a throat in a beautiful arc…  That ended, strangely enough, in a glass.

This glass was in the hands of a handsome man.

"The shadow", of her real name Tara, was surprised.

Not only did that man manage to hide his presence from her, but he also visibly wanted to do a show of force to her, as he filled not one, but a few hundred glasses, without letting a single drop of blood fall to the floor.

Tara instantly decided to retreat. She would rather flee than taking unnecessary risks.

She transformed into a shadow and hid under the floor, fully taking advantage of the rudimentary craftsmanship of this world.

After feeling safer, she anxiously looked back. The strange man didn't follow her at all.

He was just… Drinking?

Wine?

No.

It was one of the glasses of blood.

He was murmuring some things, certainly talking to himself.

It could be something that he wouldn't want anyone to hear, which is why it was a pity, at least for him, that Tara had good ears.

-This Emperor certainly has incredible luck. No, everything about This Emperor is incredible.

Tara furrowed her brows while hearing that, struggling to process the information in that sentence, or at least the lack thereof.

-Even This Emperor's system is incredible! The blood system is the best!

Tara kicked the floor.

It was good that she was a shadow, moreover under the floor. Hitting anything could've prevented her from hearing more. Not that she particularly wanted to, as that so-called emperor's way of talking really was infuriating her.

While drinking blood, the emperor had what seemed from the outside to be an orgasm.

-Ooohhhh yeeeaaaahhh!

That…

Tara directly categorized him as a weirdo. Some people do have weird hobbies, but that guy was clearly a real psycho.

She decided to stay here for a while, at least until he went away.

[…]

She somehow had a strong, imperious feeling that she not only NEEDED to kill him but also had to keep his intact brain and sexual parts…

After some time pondering she didn't find the source of it, but she felt that it came from her entire being.

[…]

Tara got back to her classroom covered in blood.

Beyond the dissection, which she expertly did without much splashing, most of the blood came from the killing itself. She had to kill that man what felt like a thousand times to finally finish him off. He was able to revive many times, and seemingly based on the quantity of blood he drank beforehand.

She pushed a button on the wall.

After taking out an empty bottle from the wall, she put the new brain and donger inside.

Tara then used a marker to write "blood system, second chance" on a post-it that she put on it.

Finally, she took the "interesting assassin" bottle, removed her body parts from her body, and put them in the bottle.

She then became Rald again.

Without losing a second, he washed himself of all the blood with one of the blood-sucking plants he kept in his laboratory.

It was already morning, and he had a meeting.

With that fly that bothered him gone, it was now time for him to go to work.

How keywords were used:

System, emperor, psycho, and kick were used to create the character that shows up in this chapter. Instead of making him an actual emperor, I made him a narcissist with a system. Kick comes in by making this character one with an infuriating behavior you could want to kick him for.

Second chance came in the post-it, and it also created some new plans for the next few chapters.