Shattered Mask

[Do you feel that your life is worthless? Always failing, losing a lot of things, and losing the will to live? It's really sad! But don't worry, I can give you some opportunities to live like a strong person. I know you want it. Don't be afraid, just come to the Liveless building across from the abandoned apartment in the city park area. I'll be waiting for you!]

I sighed after reading this nonsensical text message. There were about 10 messages sent to my number since yesterday from a completely unknown number. I decided to call it, but only heard the operator say that the number was out of service.

Tonight was bright as usual for this dry season. The sky wasn't too dark, with a crescent moon hanging beautifully in the distant sky above, not to mention the presence of stars that would delight astronomers. Unfortunately, I wasn't interested in celestial objects.

Well, here I am on the roof of my friend's karaoke cafe, because he invited me to help him prepare an engagement event for his girlfriend, while at the same time making fun of me because out of all the invited guests, I was the only one without a partner. 

But believe it or not, I didn't feel sad or anything; watching people pursue their life goals with enthusiasm made me happy, too.

"Joe? Are you still here?" A familiar female voice greeted me as she approached.

Katharina had been my friend since childhood; we had practically never been apart because we always happened to go to school together. 

Tonight it seemed that Katharina's smile was more beautiful than the presence of stars. She was wearing a knee-length silk dress with long maroon lace sleeves and elegant heels in the same color. 

Her face had light make-up on and her waist-length hair flowed freely down her back. She smiled at me as she showed me her ring finger, which was adorned with a sparkling sapphire ring, a sign of her engagement today.

"I'm getting married soon, you should start looking for a girlfriend too. You'll definitely be lonely when I get married," Katharina joked as she nudged me.

I looked at the night sky. "Don't worry, I won't be lonely. Maybe it's better if you start preparing for your new life after marriage," I said.

"I've talked to Calvin about it..." Katharina paused for a moment. "We are going to move abroad after the wedding. It's Calvin's job, as his wife I have to go wherever he goes."

I wasn't sure, but Katharina sounded hesitant. I wondered what it would be like for a woman who had become a wife; she would have to leave her home, her family, and start a new family for herself and Calvin.

I'm not good at cheering people up, so I spoke honestly. "Calvin is a good man. He helped you from college until you started working. He also gave me a job when I was out of work. You can definitely count on him. If not, just hit him."

Katharina chuckled. I met Calvin through Katharina 3 years ago, I usually don't pay attention to new people, but my instinct told me that Calvin was indeed a good man when he tried to approach me to help him get closer to Katharina, and also became the intermediary courier delivering food for Katharina during the approaching period.

"Is that so?"

I didn't feel that the question needed an answer because the answer was already clear, but Katharina looked me straight in the eye as if she was waiting for a definite answer for some unknown reason.

"Yes, that's it," I replied casually.

Whether it is or not, I couldn't help but think back to my first meeting with Katharina when we were both eight years old. I had just moved to a new apartment, and because I didn't like crowds, I always spent my days at home after school, until Katharina invited me to get to know her, and I was often forced to play cook with her and her other friends in their pretend cooking game when we were kids.

When I thought about it again, I couldn't remember exactly why I had become close to Katharina, even though I had already forgotten the names of the other friends. Even our backgrounds were very different.

Katharina was born into a wealthy family, and every school holiday she would always travel out of town or go on trips abroad. Since elementary school, Katharina has been popularly known as the 'Princess' thanks to her beautiful face and gracefulness, which are clear evidence of her noble upbringing.

However, she is the most humble person I have ever met; she socializes with everyone and is kind to everyone, including me who is completely different from her.

I only live with my mother who works as an office employee with a meager salary. My parents have divorced, and my mother often says that my father loves me and frequently asks about how I am doing, but I don't even remember what his face looks like or what his voice sounds like. Honestly, I don't care.

When I graduated from high school, my mother fell ill and it was up to me to take over her job. I didn't have time for college because of my busy schedule in collecting money for my mother's medical expenses; that's where Katharina helped me a lot. I always refused her help, but she insisted. 

I thought I could take care of my mother alone with the money that I had saved up; besides, I didn't want anyone's pity. However, fate had other plans; after being sick for four years, my mother passed away. Once again it was Katharina who accompanied me and comforted me.

I felt indebted to Katharina for all her kindnesses towards me so far; therefore, I did everything in my power to repay her. She adamantly refused the money when I tried returning it after she paid for my mother's hospital bills; that's why all I could do was support her in achieving happiness.

When Calvin contacted me a week ago expressing his desire to marry Katharina, I was ecstatic. Calvin and Katharina are the perfect couple idolized by everyone, and on the other hand, I was happy because after they get married, I can finally be free of my debt of gratitude to Katharina. She would definitely be angry if I said this, so I kept it to myself.

"You're still the same as before. Can't you show a little bit of enthusiasm?" Katharina said while pouting her lips.

"I'm excited, you know. I'm happy." These words must have annoyed Katharina even more, because she immediately turned to me with a troubled expression.

"Have you ever tried to feel someone else's feelings other than your own?" she said quietly.

I was confused as to what I had said that had hurt her. I was really happy for her.

"I've been thinking about this for a long time, have you ever felt sad, happy or angry? You never tell me anything, let alone share your sadness with me. We've known each other for so long, and this time I want you to say that you're happy. Happy for yourself, not for me. Do you even have a purpose in life?"

It wasn't the first time Katharina was angry with me, but somehow her words echoed in my mind. Do I have a purpose in life?

Katharina wiped her eyes roughly; she wasn't crying, but sadness radiated from her brown irises. "Forget it. Before I get married, all I want is for you to find a girlfriend and attend my reception with her. Please don't make me regret this decision."

"Why would you regret it?" The question slipped out uncontrollably.

Katharina looked down, tears streaming down her face as she clenched her fists on both sides of her body. I wanted to call Calvin, but I held myself back because he might misunderstand the situation.

You made my future wife cry? I imagined patient Calvin saying as he whacked me with his coffee mug in his shop.

"You are so insensitive! Your indifference and apathy are unbearable!"

After saying that, Katharina ran downstairs. I ran after her, but she turned into the executive corridor, which surely contained rooms reserved for important people like Calvin, who received his guests there. 

So, it was impossible for me to follow Katharina; besides being rude, chasing a crying, recently engaged woman would make me lose face. Worst of all, I might go viral on social media with the headline "Clueless Man vs. Famous Cafe Owner".

I decided to send a message to Katharina apologizing and asking her to meet me tomorrow morning while I sorted out this incident.

I was about to put my phone in my jacket pocket when a notification rang.

[I'm waiting for you. Come on, I'm bored].

The message from the number that had been harassing me since yesterday seemed relentless. If it was just a prank, I would have ignored it and blocked it. However, I felt uneasy and as if someone was watching me from somewhere.

I squinted into the distance, the darkness of the night greeted me at the end of the street. A new message came in again, this time definitely not from some idle prankster.

[Joe, I am worried about you. Come here if you want to make your life more meaningful. I guarantee you won't regret it].