The Strongest Son-in-law

The world called me the strongest being, but all my strength and wisdom couldn’t see one dagger coming: a dagger held by my beloved wife.

The one person I trusted in the world and believed would have my back till the end... betrayed me to bring about my end with her own hands.

As she dug the dagger deeper into my heart, I pathetically fell to my knees, as though I was admitting my mistakes. To make my soul hurt more, my head soon touched her feet.

“Oh my-sweeting, Myles,” she pitied, her fingers touching her mouth. “Even in death, you try to lick my feet. You really are such a feet-person.”

Yeah, I liked clean feet. And I licked my wife’s feet many times, but now, her words made me regret all those times I thought I was making love with her, thinking she loved me back the same. Now, I realized that I hankered after her like a moth seeking flames.

“Myles, you are so strong yet so dumb,” her mother’s sneering voice stung my dullening ears. “You’ve saved the world, but you can’t even save yourself. Talk about the irony of life, huh.”

To think those would be the last words that I, the strongest warrior-mage the world has ever seen, would get to hear as I die… can a person’s life be any more ironic? Can fate be any more cruel?

It very much can.

Because I didn’t die.

I opened my eyes again. The clouds were moving low and fast, with raindrops hitting me all over without any mercy. The Grrs and Wrrs of dogs reached my ears, making me realize that they were digging their mouths into my abdomen, competing with each other to get the juiciest parts for themselves.

“Begone!” I yelled, and the dogs bailed with blood and meat chunks in their mouths, but they couldn’t run for long as they collapsed, convulsed and died pathetically.

My blood and flesh must be poisoned.

I sat up, and my intestines spilled out onto my crotch. The intestines were black in color. My skin was also scaly and dark grayish. It was an ugly sight to behold. Not enough to make me frown, though.

I moved my hand over my belly in a slow and steady motion. All the physical wounds got healed instantly, but I could still feel something stinging my heart. (This is… spiritual poison! What a headache to carry.)

I looked around, and it was a desolate shore with rotting sea creatures for company. I stood with effort. My body still felt stiff.

I checked my arms, and then I touched my face. Everything felt quite the same, be it my arms or bone structure, but the difference was… I felt younger.

I waved my hand, and a magical mirror appeared before me, floating. I looked at it, and behold, I was indeed younger. Probably by ten years? I am only around 25 now. Strange, to say the least.

“How strange… Did someone use forbidden magic on me? But they were very clumsy at using it, and I got poisoned because of that.”

Suddenly, a horrible pain gripped my head. I clutched my head and groaned. I ordered it to go away, but it pretty much escalated, and every nerve in the head ached. Bits and pieces of memories kept pouring into my conscious mind like the unpleasant saliva from my mother-in-law’s mouth everytime she talked.

“What the hell is this?” I squeezed my head so hard, pressing my palms against the temple, hoping the pain would subside, but it kept on at it until the memories played in full.

It was a full one minute of torment that felt like a thousand minutes of torture, though not as soul-trembling as when my engorged penis had once got stuck in my wife’s contracting vagina for many breaths. That was truly one of the scariests moments of my life because I thought I was in the safest place in the world, and then I wasn’t.

The torturous pain kept at it for a little while, and then it stopped. I was sweating, panting, with saliva and snot coming out from my mouth and nose. It was disgusting, to put it mildly.

But right now, I was worried more about something more than my appearance. It wasn’t about the sharp pangs of sadness swirling in my heart because I got stabbed by the person I trusted the most, either.

I jumped and flew into the sky and stopped in midair at about ten thousand feet high.

Shock took over my eyes as I saw a world completely different from what I know.

“I’ll be damned. Am I seeing things, or… what are these odd vehicles, and why are there so many people walking the streets like ants?”

A missile was launched in the distance. And it came flying at him fast.

“What’s this thing that’s winging to meet me?” Myles wondered. “I don’t remember my wife ever flying so fast toward me.”